forget me not
by BlackbeltBarbie
Summary: AU Sirius is a young socialworker. One day he get's a call from the policestation. Sirius tries to help the teenager as good as he can, but how good is good enough? And how good is too good? I'm terribly sorry, but I'm really no good at summaries.SLASH!
1. Chapter 1

Ok... Here we go...

HI!

I'm pretty nervous here, cause this is the first story I'm posting in like... well... ever... I hope you'll like it. I have the feeling it's going to be good. Before you start reading... My English isn't perfect, so excuse me for made mistakes against the language. Hope you enjoy the story.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this. Everything conserning HP is JK's work, and I respect that. Eventhough I really wish I owned Sirius... Maybe I can ask him for Christmas... And Remus too!

Summary: AU Sirius is a young social worker. One day he get's a call from the police station. Sirius tries to help the teenager as good as he can, but how good is good enough? And how good is too good? I'm terribly sorry, but I'm really no good at summaries... Rated M for later chapters, it's all safe now!

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_**Chapter 1...**_

It was a rainy Tuesday morning in mid-October as Sirius entered the police office of a small town called Pool which situated itself near the sea. He had been called just a few hours ago by the head of the police department saying they had found a boy of approximately 16 years old. Sirius, the good social worker that he was, has agreed to come and talk to the boy whom did not seem to open up to anyone else. It was even possible that he had to place this kid in a family that wanted to take care of him. However Sirius who himself had been in a few foster houses while growing up knew that it wasn't all that easy. In fact it was quiet hard. You never knew how long you'd be in one place, or if the people would be nice, if you'd belong with them, or if they were going to hurt you as well…

He stopped at the desk where he had stood a couple of times these last few months. He had the feeling that this place would never change.

A blond woman that stood behind the desk looked at Sirius with wondrous eyes.

'Can I help you sir?' She had a friendly voice.

'Yes, my name is Sirius Black. I was called about a boy who was found last night.' Sirius said in a serious tone. 'He was found in a dark alleyway.'

'Oh yes, you must be the social worker,' It wasn't a question; it was more of an assumption. However Sirius did nod, which made his long dark hair fall in an unnaturally perfect way. The woman came from behind the desk. 'Follow me than…' As they walked a path that Sirius had already walked a few times and therefore knew by hard the woman told him that the boy did not say a word at all. They had no idea who he was, or where he came from.

'Hopefully you can help him.' The woman said as they reached the department where the young boy was sitting right now. 'Evelyn is still inside. You know the drill right?'

'Of course…' Sirius said trying to be friendly to the young woman. She nodded her head, and turned around, walking away and eventually leaving him alone in the dark and grim hallway. Sirius knocked on the door, and after a few seconds he could hear a more familiar voice telling him to come in.

He opened the door and found himself in a white painted room with 3 desks some old computers and lots and lots of paperwork. It seemed as if he was back at His own bureau, because it looked exactly the same.

'Good morning Evelyn.' Sirius said in his friendly tone. He and Evelyn went way back. She was the one who found him when he himself was practically living on the street. She was also the one that helped him get off.

'Good morning Sirius.' The woman in her late forties said. Evelyn was a tall and skinny woman, with brown hair with a grayish shine. The wrinkles underneath her eyes showed that she too had not had an easy life. 'How are you today?'

'Pretty good.' Sirius said smiling. 'How about you?'

'I'm still alive.' The woman too smiled at Sirius, who she for some reason saw as the son she never had. 'But I'm glad you are here. The boy we found needs help. We think he ran away, and got attacked, and possibly raped, but we can't be sure. There hasn't been anyone here to ask for him…'

'Where is he?' Sirius asked suddenly more worried. Evelyn made it seem that there was something terribly wrong with this boy who still remained nameless.

'Just over there.' Evelyn nodded to a corner where a few chairs stood, a place where people could wait. Sirius turned around at looked at the boy.

He was quiet skinny as if he had not eaten in a long time, his shaggy brown hair grew wildly, and you could see that it grew like that naturally. He was looking down to the floor, but Sirius could see the huge bruises he had on his arms and face which made Sirius realize that the poor kid probably had them everywhere. He seemed fragile, and yet he defiantly looked 16, Sirius even thought him to be older.

He walked over to the boy tying not to scare him off. As Sirius stood by his side, he took the seat to the right of the boy, which made him look up in surprise. He looked at Sirius for the first time since he had entered the room, and Sirius could see that even though this boy has all those bruises, that split lip, and that cut on his forehead he still had the most beautiful eyes Sirius had ever seen. They were like pools of gold.

'Hello, my name is Sirius.' He started off, seeing as the boy would not start talking himself. 'What's your name?' The boy did not say a word, and just kept staring at Sirius intently. 'I'm only here to try and help you. I know it's hard to trust a complete stranger but I really want to help you. If it helps, I'll tell you a bit about myself…' Sirius was not sure but he thought he saw the boy give a soft nod. 'SO my name's Sirius, I live here in Pool with a woman named Anna. I got placed in my first foster home at the age of 10, because my parents weren't the nicest of people, at least not to me. Apparently I was never the best foster child, and I eventually ran away from my last foster home when I was 16. After that my best friend's parents took me under their wing. When I turned 18 I went to live on my own, well together with Anna. After studying I started working as a social worker, and I have been doing that for the last couple of months. I'm about to turn 21 now, so I'm also still very young, and I do know how you feel right now.'

As Sirius was done talking he realized that the boy was still watching him, with his intense gaze. Sirius asked him again what his name was but he still did not get an answer out of the boy. Sirius stood up again, and went to Evelyn.

'He isn't willing to speak is he?' Sirius asked the older woman, who was currently sitting behind her desk.

'No not really.' Evelyn agreed with him. 'He's just scared. What will you do with him?'

'I'd try to find his parents, but as he's not willing to speak I'm afraid I'll have to find him an institution that can offer him more help, and then when I find he needs it maybe a foster home or a ------'

'No please don't take me to another foster home! I don't want to go there anymore.' It was the first they had heard of the boy, and his tone was scared, fearful. Sirius turned around to the boy at once, and he could see that the boy was freaking out.

'I don't want to go!' He started yelling while he shook violently. 'Please don't put me in an institution or a foster home. I don't want to go. Please don't make me!'

Sirius walked over to the boy again, and tried to shush him. But the minute Sirius came too close the boy bucked away.

'Don't hurt me…'

'It's ok, it's ok. I promise I'm not going to hurt you…' Sirius said in a calm but very concerned voice. Although he was a teenager, he seemed to be broken up on the inside. 'And I'm not going to make you do anything that you don't want to do, but you have to let me help you.'

The boy seemed to calm at Sirius' words and his voice. It was strong, yet sweet, and although Sirius himself did not know why it had a calming tone to it.

'Tell me what you want, anything it's ok.' It was weird that now that 'the boy' was standing at well Sirius could see that he was just a few inches shorter than Sirius himself. The boy seemed to be quiet again, but he did not have to speak for Sirius to know what he needed, because just a minute after Sirius had asked what he wanted, the boy stomach started rumbling. 'Are you hungry?'

The boy just nodded.

'Than we'll go for a bite to eat, my car is just outside. Is that ok with you? I won't take you anywhere you don't want to go.'

The boy nodded again.

'Perfect.' Sirius sent the boy a reassuring smile. 'Let's go then.'

As the boy was getting ready to leave with Sirius, Sirius talked to Evelyn.

'What are you going to do then?' Evelyn asked.

'I don't know, but I just feel that he needs my help.' Sirius could not explain why, but something about this boy just hit him like a ton of bricks. 'I need to help him.'

Evelyn nodded, while smiling at the young man.

'Hopefully you'll be able to.' She aid as they found the boy was ready. 'Good luck to both of you.' Just as they were about to leave the older woman added something to Sirius. 'Say hi to James, Anna and Lily will you?

'Of course I will.' Sirius answered. 'See you soon Evelyn. Come on… You…' He added towards the teenager standing next to him.

As they were walking down the hall, Sirius found himself staring at his silent companion. He had something Sirius could not place, but it had a ring to it even at this moment, while this boy was obviously very hurt and scared.

'Remus…' Sirius suddenly heard a voice, and it took him sometime to realize that it was the boy who had spoken.

'What?' Sirius said completely ripped out of his thinking-path.

'My name, it's Remus.' The boy stated. 'Remus Lupin.'

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This was the first chapter. Hope you all liked it... Let me know if you did, and also let me know if you did not like it...

Than I can try to be better next time.

Love to all...

**XoXo**


	2. Chapter 2

Hello everyone!

And thanks for the amazing reviews. I have to admit I was kind of worried no one would like it… So anyways, this will be the second chapter (obviously). I've tried to lighten up the mood because my friend thought it was too dark to start up with. I just have a feeling that 'trying to light up the mood' kind of took away the actual sadness of the fic. although if you look at it from another point of view, it does show in that Sirius is in a good place right now while Remus is tottaly fucked up.

Hopefully you'll all enjoy it…

Disclaimer: As for now I still don't own any of this… Too bad…

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**Chapter 2**

Sirius found himself sitting on the opposite of a boy he now knew as Remus Lupin. He was eating the chicken he ordered as if it was the most precious thing upon the planet, something to be savored. Sirius could not help but laugh towards his own plate for the few seconds he could keep his eyes of off the teenage boy.

They had been quiet for some time now. They were sitting in this small but homey, yet not too crowded restaurant. The walls were painted in a light gray, which matched the chairs and other furniture amazingly well.

'So Remus,' Sirius started eventually when the quiet became too much for him to handle. 'How old are you anyway?'

Remus, who seemed more than surprised that Sirius had broken the silence and had asked him an actual question, dropped is fork in shock and looked up at Sirius with those big golden eyes of his. Sirius who had never seen such an intense gaze before could not help but shudder.

'I'm sixteen, but I'll be seventeen in two months.' Remus said eventually, however even after he had spoken he kept watching Sirius with a little bit of wonderment in his eyes. Sirius could not help but think that somehow, somewhere, he had seen this boy, Remus, before.

'Where are you from Remus?' Sirius continued now that he had the teenager's full attention.

'I was born in France, but I had to move here to England more than eight years ago.' Sirius was happy, and surprised that Remus answered his questions without being freaked out or paranoid.

'What do you want to do next?' Sirius asked in a friendly and comforting voice. Remus looked at him as if he could not understand the question. 'I mean after you're done eating…' Sirius did not know how to explain himself. What did Remus need? Did he need his family? Did he need foster parents? Did he need…? Wait a minute… He was actually 16, so that could be an option as well… In fact, it should not be a problem. 'Where do you stand on emancipation?'

'What?' Remus looked at him in surprise. No one probably had ever asked him that question before.

'Well you'd be an adult at the age that you have right now. You would not have to be placed into a new family or an institution. You could be on your own.' Sirius explained to the younger man in front of him.

'I know what it means.' Remus said to Sirius. 'You're just the first one to mention it to me.'

'There is a first time for everything.' Sirius said smiling at the very beautiful man in front of him. _–wait… Did I just say beautiful? He's sixteen, Sirius, sixteen!-_

Sirius finally ripped his eyes from Remus his gaze, and looked at everything that wasn't the boy.

'I'd actually like that…' Remus said eventually, making Sirius look up at him again. 'But where should I stay until then?

'Where can you stay until then?' Sirius thought, and thought, and thought… Well, he tried to. When He was done thinking he decided to give the stupidest answer ever. 'You can stay with me.' As soon as Sirius had said it he too realized how stupid and completely wrong it was. 'I mean, I could also take you to a sort of shelter.'

'No I don't want to ever go to a shelter again; I'd rather go back-'There he cut of his sentence, not longer willing to actually go on.

'Than stay at my place, we still have an extra room.'

'Won't your wife mind?' Remus asked this question in wonderment, and yet it sounded sarcastic, ironic maybe even cynical.

'My wife?' Sirius asked not knowing what Remus had mend. 'Which wife?'

'Yes your wife… I believe she's called Anna…' Remus continued. 'Unless you have more than one.'

'I don't have any!' Sirius defended himself. 'Anna and I just live together.' He stated, while giving Remus a warm smile. 'In fact I think she might be mad at me if I let you walk on the streets.'

Sirius did not know why, but it did not seem wrong at all to want to take Remus home, to want to take care of this innocent teenage boy.

'Pleas Remus, I just want to help.' Sirius himself realized far too late that his statement was far more than a plea than he had anticipated it to be. He just hoped that the handsome young man in front of him hadn't noticed. _–wait! Did I just call him handsome? Not again!–_

'If it's not a problem to you.' Remus sounded very polite for someone who had the age of sixteen, it really seemed like he did not want to intrude. Yet his eyes spoke differently, he wanted a place to stay, and getting an offer like that made his golden eyes light up as the sun.

'It's not.' Sirius murmured still half transfixed on Remus' his eyes.

'In that case I'd love to accept the offer.' Although he said it reluctantly it was the first time in the 3 hours Sirius had known Remus that the young man had smiled.

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While they were driving towards a shop nearby the apartment that Anna and Sirius shared, Sirius decided it was at least time to inform his roommate of their guest.

'This is Anna Santos speaking.' A young woman on the other side of the line said in a very warm and friendly voice.

'Hey Anna! It's Siri!' Sirius said in a happy voice which he only shared with a few people. 'How are you?'

'Good, I just finished my last class of the day. I'm going home in half an hour, and what are you doing today? I got your message, by the way. How's the boy?'

'Yes, about that…' Sirius started carefully. 'I'm bringing him home. He does not have anywhere else to go, and-'

This is where Anna cut him off.

'Siri you know I don't mind.' Anna's voice was soft and friendly just like always. 'I'll just call Lily and James to tell them we're not coming today.'

'Thank you, Anna!' Sirius stated happily. 'What would I do without you?'

'I don't know, but let's not find out anytime soon.'

'Let's not find out, ever.' Sirius continued, as relief still washed over him. He and Anna had been friends in what seemed like forever, and Anna had yet to give up on him. She had to be special, right? 'I'm going to a shop now to get Remus some clothes and a toothbrush and stuff. When we're done, we'll come straight home…'

'Ok, I'll you then and there! I love you, Siri.'

'Love you too, Anna.' After the conversation ended Sirius put his phone away, and tried to focus on the road in front of him. However he found himself shooting glances at Remus at any chance he got.

'What was it with this boy?' He thought silently. 'How can a person who seems so familiar to me, be so new to me?'

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'So what do you think?' Remus asked as he came out of the fitting cubicle with a brown sweater and a pair of new dark jeans on. Sirius looked up at the teenager and smiled. Remus looked already much healthier with clean clothes, unsaid of the almost racks he had worn up till now.

'It looks great.' He said, nodding at the young man. 'It's totally your size. It fits perfectly, and brown looks really good with your hair.'

'Brown looks really good with your hair?' Sirius repeated the sentence in his head. 'What were you thinking? That sounds so gay!'

'So Euhm…' Remus stood there in the middle of the shop, feeling very uncomfortable and exposed. He did not like people looking at him, most of the time that just ended in disaster, and now he was standing here letting this man check if the outfit looked good. Remus did not even know what he was doing here right now. He went home with a complete stranger, someone he had only seen once before a very long time ago… 'Can I change back?'

'Yes, of course…' Sirius snapped out his train of thoughts as he realized Remus had asked him a question. 'I'll go look for a few other things in that size, if it doesn't fit I'll bring it back later… In fact just keep it on, and give me the tickets.'

'What do I have do with my clothes, then?' Remus asked Sirius in a small, shy voice.

'We'll leave them here.' Sirius said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

After paying, and looking for other things, and than paying again, which took more time than they had expected, Sirius decided to finally go home. It was time that Remus and Anna met…

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So this was it... let me all know what you think... You know what this means... you all need to review!!

XoXo

BB


	3. Chapter 3

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Hi everyone!

**Thanks for all the reviews! I got parily happy reading them... ****As you all can see the next chapter is up... Hope you'll enjoy it! Let me know what you think! Oh, before I forget, my christmas vacation started today, which means that I'm about to start travelling to my grandmother, where my mother and I are living at the moment. I don't have internet there, so I don't think I'll be able to post Chapter 4 any time soon...**

**Disclaimer: Still don't any of it... *singing: 'Oh cristmas tree, oh cristmas tree, Pleas give me Siri...'**

**Love to all, and as I'm not sure I'll still be able to say it, Happy holidays!**

**XoXo**

**BB**

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_**Chapter 3**_

When they arrived at the apartment it had started raining and it was already turning dark outside. The building, itself, contained only 5 other apartments.

'Where is yours?' Remus asked as Sirius pointed to the building.

'It's the apartment on the right side of the top floor.' Sirius answered. 'I've been living here almost 4 years now. It's pretty fun.'

'And what about that woman?' Remus now asked, as Sirius opened the door so the both could enter, and finally turn away from the cold that had washed over the town.

'She moved in together with me, and then about a year ago she started packing her stuff to leave…' Sirius said smiling at the younger man, who was now scanning the hallway.

'And then?' Remus asked, now actually curious why she didn't leave.

'And then she unpacked again, and didn't leave.' Sirius explained.

'Why not?' Remus went on while looking at the colorful staircase. It was obviously a very nice apartment, and Remus could not help but wonder how a college student and a social worker could afford living in a place like this. It seemed the kind of building where you started living in when you where older, and had saved some money.

'It's a long story, and Anna does not like to hear it, but maybe I'll tell you some other time.' Sirius said suddenly not really willing to answer Remus' his question. Remus, not knowing what to say, just nodded. It obviously was a sensitive subject, and Remus got the distinct idea that it was Sirius, rather than Anna, who did not like to hear nor tell the story.

As Sirius opened the door to the apartment they both got surprised by loud yelling, and screaming.

'What do you mean: 'The papers of your presentation went lost, you'll have to do it again?'

'Oh yeah…' Sirius suddenly said in a dry tone. 'Anna can be weird and loud all at once.'

'No, I don't care that it was an accident. I put a lot of work into that presentation! It's 40% off my grade!' The screaming off the person that was supposedly Anna went on, and on. She seemed… Upset. 'Well, you should! Thank you. Goodbye!' It was safe to say that the 'thank you' came out rather sarcastically.

'Anna, we're home…' Sirius yelled in the direction the voice came from. 'I'm going to check up on her, the living room is right down the hall. Make yourself feel a home.'

Remus nodded, as Sirius walked towards where ever it was that Anna now was. Remus found the living room easily. It was a resemblance of their hallway. It was incredibly spacious, and modern, yet not too much. It was still a livable living room. The room was colored beige, yet one wall was dark purple, just like the couch. There was a table that in comparison to the rest of the room looked old, almost antique. It was painted in the same beige as the walls. There were pictures, and paintings hanging everywhere, and even a nice big fire place. It actually was a real home. Remus hadn't seen a place like this in a long time, it felt special to be here. Yet he could not help but feel like an intruder, and he still wasn't sure that this was a good idea. Who knows what would happen to him next? People had promised him so much, yet he had always come out more scarred, more pained, more fearful.

Remus walked over to the couch. When he came to sit on it, he saw a book lying on a small table nearby. It was a Jane Austen novel. It lay there on the table, next to a book entitled 'corporate law', and another 'methodology of law'. Remus soon decided that he preferred Jane to a book about the law.

He had only been reading for a few minutes when the door opened, and Sirius entered together with a young woman, who had to be the same age as Sirius was. The woman had long brown hair, and dark green eyes, with just a shade of gray. She was pretty tall for a woman, yet Remus thought it would not do her justice if she was shorter. She wore black with white colored glasses, which totally matched the outfit she had on. She was fairly beautiful, and had an amazing smile that made her seem all the more friendly.

She walked up to him, and laughed warmly at the young man.

'Hello, you must be Remus…' It wasn't a question, so Remus decided not to answer. He wasn't sure if he even wanted to. 'My name's Anna. I saw you already found my book… Do you think it's any good? I mean I love Jane Austen.'

She was trying to get a conversation going, yet if she did not stop talking Sirius would never be able to say anything.

'Me too.' He said eventually. 'I really like 'persuasion'.'

'My favorite is definitely 'pride and prejudice'.' Anna indeed seemed like a very friendly woman, if you denied the fact that 10 minutes ago she had been obviously furious with someone.

It had gone quiet for a few moments, and then Remus noticed the other books again.

'So, you study law, right?' Remus asked Anna, and the young woman nodded.

'I'm in my last year…' Anna explained. 'Next year I'll finally be able to put all of the hard work in to practice.'

'Remus, don't be fooled…' Sirius came in between. 'She only acts smart… It's all fake, really! She is a big fraud.'

At some point they all forgot how they had actually started the conversation. Even though Anna and Sirius mostly did the talking, Remus felt content, even if it was just for a short period of time.

'So Remus, would you like to see your room?' Sirius asked with a soft smile after dinner. 'Anna will wash the dished…'

'I'm not your slave, Black…' Anna and Sirius were always bickering, like only friends could. It seemed a natural interaction for the both of them.

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'I know it's not much.' Sirius said when he and Anna had opened the door to Remus' new room.

'We can clean it out this weekend, and then it will already seem much bigger.' Anna added for good measurement.

'If you think the room's still too crowded you can sleep in mine until were done here…' Sirius went on, but as soon as he realized Anna was looking at him all funny, he added something. 'I'll stay here, I don't mind.'

'It's perfect.' Remus said, looking around. There were still boxes everywhere. This had obviously been their storage room. 'I could not ask for more.'

Remus could hardly believe that people who did not know him at all could be so good and kind to him when he did not deserve any of it, while the people that were supposed to love him no matter what were never good nor kind… However, in general being here did not really help. He still wasn't safe, he still didn't have a home, and he still was all alone when it came down to it...

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Soft music was playing on the speakers as Sirius entered the living room. Midnight had come, and went about an hour ago.

'I think he's finally sleeping.' Sirius reassured his friend, as she looked up from the book she was taking note from. She nodded gratefully.

'He seems like a really nice person. Who would hurt someone like that?' Anna put her book to the side, as Sirius came to sit next to her.

'I honestly have no idea…' Sirius said putting his head in his hands. 'I would never do that on purpose.'

'Maybe it wasn't done on purpose…' Anna spoke softly. It was weird that she always knew when Sirius, who usually seemed strong and untouchable, felt venerable and scared.

A comforting silence fell over them as they were just sitting there, the fire warming them.

'We'll have to find him a school…' Anna said suddenly, and Sirius had no idea were that came from. It was by far the last thing on his mind 'Otherwise he'll miss far too much! After all it's already October.'

'Yes, I guess so.' Sirius said, suddenly feeling very tired. 'Do you mind to talk about that tomorrow? I need sleep!'

Anna nodded.

'Good night Siri…' Anna said in a soft tone, but then added with a grin. 'Don't cheat on me in your dreams!'

'You know you're the only woman for me…' Sirius said grinning as well. 'I would only ever cheat on you with another man...'

'In that case: of you go!' Anna could not help but be happy that her mission had been accomplished. Sirius was getting far too serious (for lack of a better word).

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_Sirius was chewing gum as he sat in the small room, with only a few chairs, a bucket of toys for young children, a few books and magazines that were lying on a small table in the middle. It was like waiting when you went to a doctor. Yet Sirius wasn't waiting for his doctor, he was waiting for his new foster parents. Why was this happening again? What did he do? _

_He had just turned 15, and yet it did not change anything. It was like there wasn't a person in the world willing to help him, because according to most he wasn't willing cooperate. He wanted to get out of here, he wanted to leave. There were a few other people in the room. A secretary who was currently gossiping on the phone, a man and a woman who were softly talking, and a small boy who had to be about 11 or 12 years old. His shaggy brown hair got Sirius fixated within seconds. Sirius could not help but wonder what had happened to him, for him to be in a place like this. _

_Suddenly the boy looked up as if he had realized that someone was watching him, and the boy's eyes that were somewhat deep brown, yet almost gold, locked onto the grayish blue eyes of Sirius. Sirius smiled at the boy while pushing his hair back again. He had to get it cut it was getting far too long again. The boy gave a sad smile back, which made Sirius shiver. _

_Another 5 minutes later Sirius could not take it any longer, and he went up to the younger boy._

'_Do you want some gum?' Sirius asked as he said down next to the boy in his own nonchalant way. The boy who looked up again nodded. Sirius took out the gum and handed it over._

'_My name's Sirius.' Sirius spoke as the boy accepted what was offered to him. _

'_I'm-'but Sirius never knew what he was going to say, because the door towards the office went open, and an older woman came out. She was accompanied by an older man and a person Sirius recognized as his 'favorite' social worker. He had never pleaded his case well. Sirius had the feeling that he did not even care._

'_Sirius, these are your new foster parents. I hope you'll have a better time now.' Sirius watched the man in a dark gaze. How did he dare to break into the conversation?_

'_I'm sorry.' Sirius said in a sad tone. 'I have to go.' _

'_Thanks for the gum.' The boy said giving Sirius an actual smile. At that Sirius felt something flutter in the pit of his stomach, but before he could figure out what that was, he was pushed away, and everything went dark…_

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Sirius opened his eyes, suddenly remembering why Remus seemed so familiar to him. He had seen him before; he didn't just imagine it… He had actually seen Remus before, how could have forgotten about the boy that he, that he, that he-

'Oh shit…' Sirius sighed…

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**Hope you all liked it... Let me know! Again: happy holidays!**

**XoXo**

**BB**


	4. Chapter 4

**HI everyone!**

**I just got back from my grandmothers house... I'm actually happy that I can go to 'school' again, because at laest now I'm not confrunted with moving all the time... Hopefully your hollydays were better than mine!**

**Thanks for all the amasing reviews. I just read them! You're all very very great!**

**So another chapter is up, and I must say before you start reading... I think it sucks. It took me far longer than I expected to even get it on paper. I think it's kind off borring, but it had to be written. I promise one thing, the next chapter is going to be a lott better... (at least I hope so)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any off this (as you can tell from this I did not get Sirius for christmass... :( all the fun things I could have done...) **

**Hope you'll all enjoy it anyways!**

**XoXo**

**BB**

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After Sirius had woken up he couldn't find sleep anymore, so he lay there half the night tossing and turning. At 5.30 he had enough of staring at the ceiling, and got out of bed grumpily. He could not believe that he hadn't realized from the start that Remus and that boy, were the same person… Of course Sirius was a lot older now than he had been back then, but that did not necessarily mean that Sirius also had gotten wiser.

As he walked into the living room he found his roommate sleeping on the sofa. Anna was still wearing her reading glasses and yesterdays outfit, her notebook next to her on the ground. Music was still filling the room.

As soon as Sirius walked by her Anna woke up. Even though Sirius had decided to let her sleep some more. She had always been a light Sleeper. Sirius who knew this, and had expected this to happen no matter what, wasn't really surprised.

'Is it already time?' Anna asked in a slow murmur when she saw Sirius standing next to the sofa. She had those small squinting eyes, everyone had in the morning. He shook his head.

'No, it's only half past 5.' Sirius explained.

'In that case, what gave you the idea that you could enter my room?' Anna asked his more confused than angry.

'The fact that you've fell asleep in the living room yet again.' Sirius said smiling towards Anna. The song on the CD-player had died, but after a few seconds it started over again. 'Did you put 'everlasting love' on repeat _again_?' Sirius could not help but sound a little anoid.

'No…' Anna said suddenly feeling wide awake as well. However Anna had barely answered and the chorus of the song had already started playing. Anna always studied to Jamie Cullum, Sirius knew this very well. He had heard the songs more than enough. Anna felt that it was no use to move herself to her bed anymore, and so she soon joined Sirius in his quest for morning coffee (**AN**: the reason why I get out of bed in the morning…)

* * *

'I had the weirdest dream last night, and I'm not even sure that it was a dream.' Anna stated as she sat at the kitchen table a few minutes later. The kitchen was spacious, and had lots of open space just like the rest of the apartment. All the furniture in the room was either black or white, although the walls where a mixture a light and dark grey.

'What did you dream?' Sirius asked as he poured coffee into the two cops on the kitchen table.

'First I cancelled on Lily and James…' Anna said thoughtfully.

'That wasn't a dream.' Sirius informed her. 'That happened in the afternoon.'

'Than you brought home a teenage boy…' Anna went on. 'And I was really mad for some reason…'

'That also happened.' Sirius did not know why it was that he always seemed to tell Anna what had happened, and what she had dreamed.

'The dream ended with green men dancing around in hula skirts, while singing '_every time we touch'_ into a vibrating electric toothbrush.'

'Now that was a dream.' Sirius said laughing. 'At least I hope it was.'

It went quiet for a while, because Anna tried to figure out what happened before she fell asleep, and what happened when she was actually asleep.

'There is one thing I have to ask you…' Sirius said eventually breaking the silence between them.

'What? Did something happen?' Anna seemed concerned almost immediately.

'No, not really. It's just I remembered something last night.' Sirius stated towards his roomy.

'What did you remember?' Anna's concern had somehow made room for curiosity in less than 2 nanoseconds. Sirius thought that it had to be some kind of record, even for her.

'Do you remember that time when we were 15 when I…' Sirius was trying to find the exact words for what he wanted to say, what he wanted to explain eventually.

'Do you mean the time when you realized that you were not so into women?' Anna put it very casually, although she knew that it was exactly that moment that Sirius meant.

'Yes…' Sirius said uncomfortable 'Do you also remember why I started realizing it back then?'

Anna looked at Sirius but did not say anything. He could see that his friend was in the dark right now. He soon decided to enlighten his friend, as to what he had realized just a few hours ago…

* * *

Anna and Sirius kept talking for quite some time even after Sirius was done explaining his obvious issues. They even made sure that they were ready for another day of hard work, for once both of them on time, actually very early.

It was already half past 7 when they got joined by the third person that had slept in the apartment that night.

'Good morning Remus,' Anna smiled at the young man as he walked into the already bright kitchen. The sun had already come out to shine, and gave the kitchen that beautiful morning glow. 'Did you get a good night of sleep?' Remus nodded with sleepy eyes. The boy obviously was not really awake yet.

'Hey Remus,' Sirius said happily as he reentered the kitchen. 'What do you want for breakfast? Pancakes? Bacon? Eggs? Sausages? Frites? Pie?'

'It doesn't really matter.' Remus said in a polite voice. 'Anything will do… Wait a minute, did you just say frites?' Remus now looked at Sirius as if he had gone crazy and just had thrown himself against a velcro wall.

'Don't pay attention to him; he's always weird in the morning, and in the afternoon, and possibly at night.' Anna stated. 'But I'll make pancakes, they're pretty good, if I do say so myself…'

* * *

'I can't believe I have to do that stupid presentation again!' Anna whined as she too started eating. 'I just would like to not have to do it anymore.'

'Well…' Sirius said with a mysterious grin, yet wiggling his eyebrows rather suspiciously. 'You could always charm your way out of it!'

'Siri, not everyone is like you. Some people still have pride.' Anna did not know if she should laugh at Sirius' proposal, or if she should be offended.

'What do you mean?' Remus looked up from his pancakes suddenly suspicious.

'Nothing really.' Anna stated. 'You could however, ask Sirius how he passed Spanish…'

Remus looked at Sirius, but did not say a word. He was just waiting for Sirius to answer himself.

'I passed Spanish on skill!' Sirius said smiling at Remus. 'I had untapped talent in that classroom, and not to forget much potential.'

Anna could not help but role her eyes.

'Would you mind saying one thing in Spanish?' She asked with a knowing smile.

'Bonjour, comment cava?' Sirius said smiling proudly to Anna and Remus. Anna just shook her head in disbelief. Remus' eyes however widened as he looked from Sirius to Anna, and back to Sirius.

'I think that's French.' He stated uncomfortably towards Sirius. The young boy obviously was afraid to offend him.

'That was my point.' Anna explained. 'Sirius does not know one Spanish word; he never even attended the class.'

'Than how did he pass?' Remus seemed confused for about a second, but soon put all the pieces together, and he now too shook his head in disbelief. 'Never mind.'

* * *

After Anna left at 10am to go to class Sirius was left alone with Remus. Somehow he found it weird that yesterday they had, had a good time bonding. While today it seemed that Sirius could not help but think of the boy every time he watched Remus. It had been a long time ago, yet how long is long enough? After all, thanks to that boy, Sirius had come to realize later that he did not like girls as much as he had hoped or even thought.

Now that in fact years had passed, and Sirius had come to terms with everything that happened he thought that it would be different somehow. Now that Remus was older he did not have the same effect on him, as the boy did back then, right? Right?

'Sirius, are you ok?' Remus asked as they were driving towards a doctor to get Remus checked up. Remus had noticed that Sirius was deep in thought, and there for hardly paying attention to the road.

'What?' Sirius snapped out of his day dream.

'I asked if you are feeling alright.' Remus said again.

'Yes, I'm fine.' Sirius answered shaking his head a bit. He needed to focus, he wanted to focus, yet he couldn't.

After the short exchange of words everything went silent again. It seemed that Sirius really wasn't willing to talk. They didn't even spoke while the where in the waiting room at the doctors', and when they were actually with the doctor Remus decided not to speak at all until Sirius said it was ok, and that the man was just trying to help. It was yesterday all over again. Sirius got that Remus obviously didn't like to talk to strangers, and that he didn't trust them. Yet he could not help but wonder why Remus had put all off his faith in him then. He even wondered if Remus had actually made a good choice… The doctor checked Remus, took some blood samples, and let them out again. It was a friendly old man, yet Remus did seem happy to have gotten out of the room, and away from him. Maybe the boy didn't like doctors?

On their way back nothing had changed between them. They were awfully quiet even though at some point both of them had tried to start a conversation. Eventually Sirius had asked Remus what he wanted to eat and he had gotten an answer. They decided to make chicken soup from scratch. Sirius could only guess that Remus liked chicken…

'Was she like beautiful and stuff?' Remus asked as he and Sirius were now shopping for foods and the ingredients for their soup, because Anna had mentioned she did not have the time.

'Who?' Sirius did not understand the question.

'Your Spanish teacher…' Remus tried to sound casual about it, but it really wasn't something you through in an everyday conversation.

'He was ok…' Sirius said not looking at Remus. 'He had beautiful eyes though, kind of like y- this guy's I once knew.'

'Oh ok.' Remus just said not even giving a flinch, his expression not changing one bid. Sirius thought it a bid weird that the teenager did not seem surprised at all, but was however glad Remus did not freak out. 'Were you two together for a long time?'

'We never really were together. It was more of a passing secondary school thing.' Sirius explained with a grim look on his face.

Remus shrugged, as if he hadn't expected anything else.

'Did you have a real _friend _then?' Remus asked although this did came out more awkwardly.

'Yes, we were together for about a year. Met him in college actually, he had the most amazing hair ever, it was like this shaggy brown-'Sirius cut of his sentence as he looked at Remus once again. He had never realized this before, but every time he was with someone that even resembled a relationship the guy had something that Remus also had. 'What else do we need for the chicken soup?' Sirius tried to change the conversation.

'I'm guessing the chicken still is essential, and maybe we could ad chocolate too…' Remus answered dryly, however after a few seconds he and Sirius broke out into laughter almost forgetting the weird and very silent day they had spent together.

* * *

**So this was it... I know it's not the best, but I promise it's going to be better. I'll try :p.**

**Love to all... Read en review!!**

**XoXo**

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	5. Chapter 5

**_Hi everyone!!_**

**_Hope you are all doing alright!! I'm actually doing really bad... I'm sick, In two days I have my first exam, and I feel all alone.. :( So instead of studyng hard, and going to bed early I decided to stay up until past 1am, and write another chapter._**

**_So I hope you like it, I just finished it, and did not really feel like waiting untill tomorrow to check on mistaked again't the language and stuff... I actually think it's pretty good... It's kind of dark though... It really shows that Remus isn't in a good place right now, and there is actually something that inclines that Sirius once was were Remus is right now..._**

**_Disclaimer: Stil don't own any of this!! too bad..._**

* * *

'Finally home!' Sirius sighed as he practically fell down on the couch, and put his feet up on the small table. 'Oh god I'm so tired, I could just fall asleep right here and now!'

It had been 3 weeks since Remus came to stay with him and Anna and time seemed to pass in a flash of light. Today they had spent the whole day talking to a judge in London, where Remus still seemed to be living officially. It had been a 3 hour ride to London, and a 3 hour ride back. In general it had been a long and exhausting day. Now it was nine o'clock, and they were finally home.

'Yes, so can I, it was a busy day after all.' Remus said in a tired smile. He came to a sit on the table opposite to Sirius' face, and right next to his feet.

Sirius looked up at the boy sitting opposite off him. His bruises were practically gone, and the cut on his face was healing nicely. If Remus stopped biting his lips all the time even that split lip could heal in time.

'Well, it may have been busy, but it wasn't useless.' Sirius told him with a comforting smile towards the boy. The teenager just nodded, and soon a familiar yet comfortable silence fell upon the two.

'You know…' Remus said eventually breaking the silence; 'without your help I still wouldn't be anywhere.'

'It's nothing.' Sirius said in a friendly voice still smiling brightly at Remus. Remus however did not seem to have heard a word of what he said.

'There really isn't much I can give you in return…' Remus went on not daring to look Sirius in the eye anymore. 'But you know, if you want to, you can you know. You don't even have to ask. I don't mind.' Remus was babbling, and it took Sirius a few seconds to catch up with what Remus was saying.

'What are you talking about?' Sirius asked, not wanting to believe where this conversation was going. His smile, however, had already faded from his face. His gray eyes stood serious in just mere seconds.

'The only thing I have to offer is me…' Remus was looking down at the floor while biting his bottom lip so hard it could have started bleeding. His eyes seemed different somehow, they where shallow, and empty as if there was nothing there. It was as if all of Remus suddenly got broken apart into a million pieces, shattered across the room. 'And I've seen you look sometimes… It's ok, really. I don't care.'

Sirius took his feet off of the table immediately and came to sit up straight.

'Remus, you should never offer yourself to anyone!' Sirius could not help but sound angry, and devastated all together. 'It's not ok, and you should care. No one has the right to ask that of you!'

'I don't mind…' Remus went on, as if he had not heard Sirius. Sirius realized that there actually was a possibility that Remus hadn't heard him. 'Just do it. It doesn't matter.'

'Remus!' Sirius suddenly raised his voice, he didn't know why, he couldn't help it. 'Don't you _**ever**_ say a thing like that to me again!' Sirius had never felt this overwhelmed by something before. He didn't know why he had gotten so angry all off a sudden. He had no idea why he was standing here, yelling and screaming at a boy who possibly didn't even know better.

'Listen to me!'Sirius went on after a few slow breaths. Suddenly Remus' almost golden eyes snapped to meet Sirius'. 'You don't owe me anything, do you understand? Remus, you have to know that if anyone ever asked that of you, it's not ok. It does matter!'

'Sirius I-'Remus started, but Sirius couldn't stop anymore.

'Remus, you have to listen to me!' He went on pretty stressed, and messed up. 'No one should ever ask that from you, and there isn't a debt in the world that can ever be big enough for you to offer yourself. You are not a bargaining ship! You are not a prize!' Sirius still had no idea why he suddenly felt this way. The only thing he did know was that the person that had ever made Remus think that this was a way to deal with something made him sick to his stomach, and yet… Maybe the only thing that he really knew is that he should stay far, far away from the teenage boy.

'Sirius…' Remus tried again, pulling out a hand towards Sirius. Sirius however bucked away immediately.

'No, Remus, don't!' Sirius said not willing to come near Remus right now. Sirius' his eyes, which were normal a stormy gray had turned almost as black as his hair. 'Now go to your room!'

'But…' The boy tried, his own eyes looking sad, as shame filled them.

'Go!' Sirius didn't look at Remus as he said that last word. He got up from where he was sitting and turned his back to the boy. He had to leave now… He just had to… Remus couldn't stay here a second longer. Sirius needed time to think, and he couldn't do that when Remus sat there right next to him.

Remus, who felt broken, stupid, ashamed and mostly scared that Sirius now hated him, sighed deep, but got up eventually, leaving Sirius alone.

Sirius heard the living room open, and close. He heard Remus' footsteps across the hallway. He heard Remus' his bedroom door open and close. After that everything went quiet. Sirius just stood there, as he let time pass.

He didn't know what was worse… The fact that Remus had proposed something like that to him or the fact that even for one tiny moment he was willing to consider, and maybe even accept the proposal… He really, really was a very sick person… Remus would never trust him again, he would never trust himself again. Maybe the boy was better off without him, but he could help him, and Remus did talk to him.

Sirius was lost…

He needed to talk to someone, the only question was who?

Anna? He couldn't do that. After all she had to live with both off them, and this would certainly not make their living situation any easier.

Lily? He knew couldn't do that either. Anna would find out either way, and then she would also be mad because he didn't say anything to her.

Peter? Well, he probably could try, but there was the chance that Peter would die off a stroke.

So eventually Sirius did the only thing that was possible… He called James…

After a short talk on the phone they decided to meet each other at 'Banshees and dragons' after Anna had gotten home. Sirius still wasn't really willing to leave Remus all alone in his apartment. It wasn't that he didn't trust Remus, but he might run and hide, and that could never happen…

* * *

As Sirius found himself sitting in the café with his best friend from many years he wasn't sure what he had to tell James. He didn't even know where to start. Sure Sirius was out and proud and James accepted it, but that still didn't mean James liked hearing about it.

'Pads what happened?' James said as he sipped his drink. The room was quite dark, nothing like the place he had been with Remus the day he found the boy in the police station.

'Nothing really…' Sirius said silently. Why couldn't he stop thinking of Remus? Everything reminded him of the young man.

'Yes sure, and Lily likes it having me out late at night.' James worked at the police station where he found Remus. James however had been home for almost a month now. God knows how many time newlyweds really need. 'Tell me… Why else would you call me, if you were not going to talk?'

'To get drunk?' Sirius asked with a poker face.

'You don't need me for that, although thanks that I'm still the first person you think about when you need a drinking buddy.' James said in a jovial tone, smirking just a little at his best friend. Suddenly however his face turned more serious again. 'Now tell me.'

'Do you really want to know?' Sirius asked James with a little sigh. His voice was suddenly sadder. James knew that there had to be something off. This was not the Sirius he knew, and cared for. This was not the Sirius he loved like his own brother.

'God Sirius, this is almost worse than when you came out to me.' James stated not knowing what could be so bad. 'Just spit it out, if it's really bad, we'll get really drunk and I won't remember it tomorrow anyway.'

Sirius nodded in agreement. That actually was true. James could never remember a thing that happened when he was drunk.

'Today a 16 year old offered himself to me.' Sirius said, and James still did not seem to get it. 'And I was actually tempted to accept his offer.'

James just gaped at him for a few minutes, swallowed deep, and sad there speechless.

'Why did he do that?' James asked eventually.

'Because I'm trying to help him find a home, and he feels like he owes me in some way.' Sirius answered feeling really uncomfortable. Even James thought he was just a sick person, and James was the guy who married Lily Evans…

'And you are very attracted to him?' James asked, after he swallowed again. This time the look on James' face more considering. Sirius nodded heavily.

'Where is this boy now?' James went on.

'He is at the apartment.' Sirius answered silently. 'I took him in after I found him…'

'What were you thinking? You must have known there and then how you felt…' James stated, while he shook his head in disbelief. 'You can't keep having massed up relationships like this… I mean if last time-'

'This is not like that… Chris had nothing to do with this.' Sirius broke James off; he wasn't willing to be reminded of Chris every time he did something stupid. 'Remus isn't like Chris…'

A silence fell over them again. This time it was different. James seemed to understand now. At least he understood him better than Sirius had expected him to.

'It could have been worse.' James said eventually breaking the silence. 'But let's get drunk anyway.'

Sirius just nodded…

* * *

By the time Sirius had finally come back home Remus and Anna were both a sleep. While he was on the way to his own room, he opened the door to Remus'. The boy was lying peacefully on his bed just sleeping. It was unlike Sirius had ever really seen him. Even Sirius knew that however Remus seemed to be at ease in their house his guard was always up, he didn't really trust people. After all only today he showed that he didn't trust Sirius…

It was hard to know that the teenager actually thought, and even believed that Sirius was only helping him to get something in return. That Sirius was helping him to get him in return…

The young man slowly walked towards Remus' bed, and sat down on it. He didn't know how long he sat there, just watching Remus sleep. He only knew that at some point he had started stroking the boy's hair.

'Remus, I promise I'll protect you from all the people that want to hurt you… I promise…' Sirius said quietly, his voice barely a whisper in the darkness. 'I'll protect you, even if I have to protect you from myself… You'll finally be happy…'

Before he knew what he was doing, he leaned down, and placed a soft kiss upon Remus' forehead. He smiled softly at the sleeping boy, before he got up and walked towards the entrance of the room. Before he shut the door he looked at Remus one more time.

'Good night, Remus Lupin.' With that he closed the door, walked off to his own room, and his own bed.

* * *

**_So again: I hope you liked it.. Pleas let me know!!_**

**_Love you all_**

**_XoXo _**

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	6. Chapter 6

**Hi everyone!! **

**Hope you are all doing ok?? I wanted to thank you for the reviews, and the support I got for my exams. They're finally over, and now I still have to wait for my results. Of course I have a really bad feeling, as usual...**

**But now, more important thing... Here, as you all can see, is my new chapter, and to be completely honest I think it sucks... It's really really bad. It's kind of an in between chapter, because I was kind of stuck with the story line, and was afrais I would get of track. **

**I hope you'll like it any way. Plz let me know!!**

**Disclaimer: as usual I don't own any off this... It all belong to JK...**

**XoXo**

**BB**

* * *

'But Siri!' Anna yelled, as her friend was getting ready to leave. It was only 7am on a very rainy Monday morning, the perfect time to sing I don't like Mondays… 'I have classes today, and shouldn't you be here when we discuss which school he'll attend?'

'I have to go to work,' Sirius said willing to get out of the apartment before Remus came out of bed. It was a few days after the incident, and the weekend had past pretty fast. Sirius had been out most of Saturday, and Sunday because he wasn't really willing to talk to Remus. He still had no idea what to tell the young man. 'Besides you spend the whole weekend with him, and I know you like him so why worry?'

'I might not pass this year!' Anna went on, 'And you know him so much better than I do. He needs you Siri, you know he does.'

As Sirius heard Anna's words he came to a halt. He knew that she was right, but he would do everything wrong, after all he already did everything wrong before... He knew that staying far away from Remus was the best thing he could do right now. Anna however saw that she was on the right path to convince her friend to stay, and help the teenage boy who was currently sleeping in there guest/storage room.

'You can help him, I know you can. You just have to try.' Anna went on her voice now softer. 'So maybe you should stop avoiding him, and just talk.'

'I'm not avoiding him.' Sirius said just too soon. Anna just rolled her eyes very visibly.

'Siri, I'm not stupid nor am I blind, I live in the same house as you remember?' Anna told her friend. It was obvious that for the last couple of days Sirius had been avoiding Remus, and for that matter Remus had also been avoiding Sirius. It was probably easy not to cross paths if both of them did not want to see each other. 'If something happened you should just discuss it. You… We cannot help him, if we can't all talk to him.'

'I know, but…'

'Siri, look, I'm just trying to help.' Anna continued, not really giving Sirius the time to plead his case. 'Maybe you should try to work things out, before it's too late.' Sirius could not help but nod, he knew that Anna was right. She actually was right most of the time. 'You know what, I'll stay home with him today, and we'll talk, and then you can talk to him tomorrow or tonight.' Sirius nodded again, not knowing what else he could do. Avoiding Remus was one thing, Avoiding Anna was completely something else, and probably impossible. The only time that he had tried to avoid her because he wasn't willing to tell het something she already had known what had been going on.

'I'll talk to him tomorrow, I promise.'

* * *

'Oh good morning sunshine.' Anna smiled as Remus walked into the room about half an hour as Sirius had closed the door. 'Had a good night of rest?'

'Yes, I slept great.' He was looking around the room as if he expected Sirius to come out of the kitchen closet at any moment.

'He's headed off to work. He's not home.' Anna said, as she realized what Remus was doing. 'So how about so breakfast? Pancakes, waffles or eggs?'

'I'd like some pancakes.' Remus said, as he sat down at the table. 'Don't you have to go to school today?'

'No… Well, yes, but really I can do without economics. It's not really an important subject.' Anna said as she started making the dough for Remus' breakfast. 'Maybe we can try to find you a school that you can attend.'

'Did you have one in mind?'

'You could go to the school that Sirius and I attended, but I don't think that's a good idea… I mean it's an amazing school, and our head master would not mind having you as a late entry, but…' Anna did not know how to go on.

Remus looked at her with sad eyes. He knew that the school that she and Sirius had attended was a very precious school, and it was probably very expensive sending him there. Remus could hardly pay for that himself, seeing as he already was living of off other people, and he got that they were not willing to pay for his school tuition, so he'd have to get some really big scholarship, and where would he find one that wasn't occupied in the middle of November?

'You shouldn't send me to a school that is that expensive. I know you can't pay for me…' Remus said, as he realized that Anna did not know how to explain it to him.

'Oh, Remus that is completely not what I meant. I mean if that's what you want we'll pay your school tuition. Well, Sirius will, I've been living off of him ever since I left high school myself.' Anna explained. 'Of course my parents pay for my school money and stuff, but the rest is all Sirius' doing really. Without him, I'd probably be off pretty bad. However that's not the point, if you want to go to Bauxbatons that is where you'll be going.'

'But if money is not the issue, than why don't you want me to go to that school?' Remus asked now smiling. So Sirius has actually saved Anna as well.

'Well, at our school all students are interns, and they stay there most of the school year. We would hardly see you.' Anna said with a soft smile towards the teenage boy in her kitchen. 'I mean you'd be home for Christmas, and Easter and summer vacation, but I really think you should stay closer to home…'

Remus did not know what to say, he could just smile softly. Why didn't he meet people like this before? People who actually cared, and wanted him close, yet not too close…

'I- Thanks…' He said eventually when he was finally able to speak. 'Which school would you prefer then?'

'Well, a friend of ours, Lily, works at a school nearby. It's called Hogwarts, and it's supposed to be a very good school. We also know the head master, so it should not be too much of a problem getting you in there. That is if you want to, of course.' Anna explained to Remus as she sat down at the table next to him. 'It's all up to you Remus.'

In went quiet for a few minutes, while Anna got back to her pancakes, and baking. As she gave Remus' breakfast he looked up to her and smiled brighter than Anna had seen him do since she knew him.

'Maybe we can go see that school… I'd really like that.' Remus said to Anna.

'Well, I could ask Lily and her husband to come over tomorrow night, and maybe we can visit the school by the end of the week…' Anna proposed, and Remus nodded.

'Have you known Lily and James for a long time?' Remus asked as he was eating, and Anna started telling how she met Lily and James, when she met them, and how they became friends…

* * *

It was just a day later that Anna actually found time to go to school, because Sirius had finally agreed to watch over Remus. It was weird that they did not dare to leave an almost 17 year old boy, who they completely trusted alone, just because they were afraid something could happen to him.

However now that she actually had the time Anna left really early to go to school. Sirius was just about to take a shower, and Remus was still asleep when she closed the apartment door behind her with her cell phone in one hand, and her books in another.

Everything seemed quiet again now that she had left. For a few minutes the only thing anyone could hear in the whole apartment was the sound of hot water running down from the shower…

'I'm sorry!' Remus burst into Sirius' room. 'I can't take it any long-' Remus' breath got caught in his throat, and his eyes widened as they landed on the half naked Sirius who was standing in his bedroom with just a towel wrapped around his waist. The teenager did not know what to do. As his heartbeat raced to new heights, he knew he could not keep watching, that he should have closed his eyes, turned around, or even better should just have left the room. Yet Remus, although he did not want to admit it, not even to himself, found it the most memorable view ever. Sirius' hair was still wet; drops of water were still glittering on his perfect chest…

'Remus?' Sirius asked in something that felt a lot like mixed surprise and fear. 'Why are you here? Did you want something?'

'I came to apologize.' Remus murmured, now trying desperately not to stare at the man who was now trying to find basically anything he could wrapped around his body.

'Euhm… You don't have to apologize, you didn't do anything wrong Remus. But I'm kind of in the middle of something…' Sirius said, as he obviously felt very uncomfortable with this. 'Would it be ok to talk about this later?'

Remus nodded, not really knowing what else to say. As he made to leave the room he could see the huge scar on the older man's waste, the only scratch on the perfect painting that was Sirius' body. Remus could not help but wonder where he got it. Although his own body was full off the scars his past had left him, he hadn't expected to ever see them on some else…

* * *

Later that evening, Remus was helping Anna do the cooking for Lily, James, and a person called Albus Dumbledore while Sirius was out getting a bottle of wine.

They had talked about Anna's class most of the time, until Remus curiosity took over. He knew that being curious at home would get him punished, but somehow he didn't believe Anna would use the same ways to punish him for being the miserable person, that he knew he was.

'Anna, can I ask you something?' Remus asked as he was chopping carrots.

'Yes, of course. Anything, Remus, you know that.' Anna said in her usual comforting voice.

'This morning I saw Sirius.' Remus started, although as it came out he knew it sounded really stupid. Anna did not seem to understand where he was going. 'I noticed he had this scar across his waste, and I wondered where he got it.'

Anna turned around to face him so quickly that she dropped the glass she had been holding. Her eyes widened in fear, and shock.

'I don't know what you're talking about.' She said in a very distant and cold tone that didn't resemble her usual voice in the least.

'But-'Remus went on, but he was cut off by Anna.

'Remus don' ask that again. I can't give you that answer.' Anna said. She made it seem like this was all she had to tell him about the subject. However before she left to check on the table in the living room, she added something in a calmer and less cold tone. 'It's not my answer to give. I can't explain this to you. Don't ask me to.'

Remus just nodded, and knew that this had to be the end of it, or maybe it didn't? After all, it wasn't Anna answer to give, but it might have been Sirius'…

* * *

**Hope you liked it anyways... Let me know plzz!!**

**Next chapter we'll finally get to see the whole Potter famely! and some other stuff, although I don't know what that will be.**

**XoXo**

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	7. Chapter 7

**Hi everyone !!**

**Thanks for the reviews, you're all really amazing people. **

**So I kind of ecpected it to take much longer to write this chapter, but when I started it almost wrote itself. Hopefully that's a good sign. I really like the ending myself. In this chapter both something about Remus and anna's past is revealed... I thought the ending to be really sad though...**

**Oh there is something else I needed to say. It's possible that there will be a bit more plot on Remus' emancipation in later chapters. However my knowledge about international is practiccaly nothing. So it will be the Belgium law I'll follow. Thanks for understanding !!**

**disclaimer: I still own nothing. It's all JK's... However I found something that is mine, the storie line :p**

**I really hope you'll like it.**

**XoXo**

**BB**

* * *

'You're going to hate us.' Lily said looking already apologetic, as Sirius opened the door to the apartment. 'You're really going to hate us, and Anna is probably just going to yell, and kill us afterwards.'

'What's happened?' Sirius asked his best friends wife as she walked into the hallway. He thought that something might be wrong, and that Remus couldn't enter the school. The thought alone that someone didn't think Remus was not good enough hurt more than Sirius would have liked to admit. 'Has it something to do with Remus?'

'No, not really…' James said as he came in after his wife, and hugged Sirius like the brother that he was. 'You know that we said it would be just us, and Dumbledore?' Sirius nodded. 'Well, someone off the school board came along.'

'That's not really a problem. You know Anna always makes far too much to eat, and Remus is quiet the same.' Sirius said smiling at the young couple. 'You'll absolutely love him…'

While James raised an eyebrow at Sirius, Sirius himself tried to ignore his friend. Lily however was shaking her head.

'You're not getting it.' Lily said worriedly. 'It's Evan…'

Sirius face whitened within seconds. He looked from Lily to James, and back to Lily.

'You mean Evan, Evan?' Lily and James nodded in unison. 'As in Anna's Evan?' the two off them nodded once more, looking a bid afraid at Sirius' shocked face. 'You were right, I do hate you.'

'Sirius, we had no choice. We don't know where this boy came from –'

'What were you thinking?' Sirius cut of his best friend. 'Were you even thinking? It's Evan! Evan! Does that ring any bells with you? Because it should you know, wedding bells.'

'Well they didn't technically ring the wedding bells… She left him at the altar, remember?' James said getting a very annoyed look from both his friend and his wife. 'But of course that's not the point.'

As Sirius was about to continue his tyrannical yelling, Anna entered from the kitchen closely followed by none other than his Remus… _Did I just Say my Remus? I meant the boy I have never seen before, who is Named R. Lupin._

'Lily! James!' Anna said happily as she hugged and kissed both of her friends. 'I've missed you two. Oh, and this handsome young man here is Remus.' Anna walked over to Remus carefully putting a hand on his shoulder to make sure he would not flinch away.

Lily and James introduced themselves to Remus. James who could see within seconds how protective Sirius was of this teenage boy looked at his friend in worry. Sirius might not want to fully admit it himself but he was completely taken aback by the young Remus Lupin.

Lily thought Remus to be very polite, yet also very distant. Although that was very understandable considering what Remus had possibly been through.

As they had just entered the living room the sound of the doorbell rang again.

'I'll go.' Anna said happily as she already walked towards to living room door. 'It's probably Dumbledore.'

Lily looked at Sirius with wide eyes.

'What if it's not?'

'Anna, wait!' Sirius tried, but Anna who was singing a song couldn't hear him. Lily was right; Anna was going to murder them all, one by one and piece by piece.

'Because I miss you, and this all that I want to say. I guess I miss you beautiful, these three words have said it all…(1)' Anna had a feeling tonight would be perfect for Remus to find a new and better place in this world. She walked to the door to let the man who should have retired a long time ago into her home.

'Oh hello, Annabella, my darling!' A loud voice spoke mockingly as Anna opened the door, and stood there dumb struck and shocked.

'Who is that?' Remus asked Sirius in a whisper from in the other room.

'How are you, baby?' The loud voice asked

'That would be Anna's ex-fiancé.' Sirius answered sighing deeply. 'Judgment day just became the apocalypse.'

* * *

'What is he doing in my house?' Anna asked Sirius about ten minutes later in their kitchen. Dumbledore had also arrived, and all their guests were now sitting in the living room with their youngest roommate.

'Your house?' Sirius now raised an eyebrow.

'Ok, fine.' Anna said. 'What is he doing in your house? I'd hoped I'd never have to see him again.'

'I know, it's just for one night.' Sirius tried. 'We're doing this for Remus.'

'Right, Remus.' Anna convinced herself nodding. 'But how come your OK whit him being here? I mean he told Snape that you were gay, and then that creep outted you to our entire school.'

'Don't remind me, I was there too.' Sirius said sighing deep. In truth he hated Evan almost as much as Anna did. He was a narcissistic bastard, who only thought about his own profit. Evan was almost as self obsessed as he was obsessed with Anna. 'It's just for one night.' Sirius repeated.

'Yes, I know. We're doing this for Remus. I'll be civil.' Anna continued trying desperately not to lose her temper already. 'I don't have to come near him, do I?'

Sirius smiled, but shook his head.

'No, you don't.'

* * *

'Get out of my house!' Anna screamed in anger. 'Get out of my house before I throw you out!'

It had only been somewhat more than an hour since Anna said she would try to be civilized with Evan. Most off the people who were sitting around the table actually were surprised at how long it took her to start yelling and screaming. Of course it could have been worse. The last time they saw each other she threw a book, and a vase at him.

'Still cranky, aren't you?' Evan said looking mockingly at his ex-girlfriend. 'You really haven't changed.'

'Did you not hear what I said? If you don't get out within a minute, I swear to god, I will kill you.' Remus had never seen Anna this angry before, and although Sirius, James and Lily seemed upset that she was screaming at him it didn't seem to surprise them in the least. 'And if by any chance Remus can't get in your school because of you said so, I will sue you. And don't think I won't.'

Evan took his coat, and was ready to get out of the apartment.

'Well… This was a lovely dinner. For as long as it lasted.' Evan said smirking at the other people in the room. 'Remus and lily, I'll see you two next week. Dumbledore, I'll speak to you tomorrow.'

Dumbledore nodded in agreement, somehow looking very amused.

'Sirius, it's always a pleasure to see you.' Evan sounded so arrogant that Remus could not help but agree with Anna to throw that bastard out of their house. 'James, well you know, if you ever want get rid of you wife… You know where to bring her.'

James seemed everything but pleased at his comment.

'Anna, you can deny it all you want, but we all know you still want me.' Evan said as he finally looked at the young woman in front of him. 'You can't even keep your passion for me secret.'

'You still have 20 seconds.' Anna said without flinching. She almost punched Evan out of the door. 'Don't forget. If you ever decide to get back into my life, I will make sure they put you in jail for stalking!' With that she threw the door in his face, took a deep breath, and walked back into the living room. 'So, who wants ice cream?'

'I'd like some, darling.' Dumbledore said smiling up at Anna, as the rest still sat in shock.

* * *

When Remus went to bed that night he could hardly believe that a woman who was normally so calm and collected could actually loose her temper like this. Of course the first thing he had heard Anna do was scream at someone, but it had been nothing compared to this.

Sirius however, had been an amazing help tonight. He had talked nothing but wonderful words about Remus, even though it seemed he also had something against this 'person' called Evan Matthews. The young boy now knew that even though they only had known each other for a very short period of time he really did mean a lot to Sirius. If only he could trust him more…

The teenage boy was actually glad he had decided not to go to Sirius' and Anna's old school. He had a feeling Hogwarts would be great!

Yet although Remus might have been very grateful towards Sirius for everything he had done, he still wanted to figure out what had happened to his house mate, and he would find out eventually…

* * *

'_Remus sweetie, will you sit still please!' Remus' mother said from the front seat. 'Your father is trying to drive. We'll be home soon' _

'_Yes mam, of course.' The young child said, as he smiled wide at his mother. The young woman smiled back. She had beautiful dark blond hair, and the same brown almost golden eyes that he had inherited somewhat more than 7 years ago now. 'I love you mam!'_

'_I love you too, my darling.' Remus' mother said smiling sown at her only child. 'What would we be without you?'_

_It was already dark outside, the weather was really bad. Snow was falling down from the sky, as Remus' father tried to make their way back home. _

'_Look dad!' Remus said enthusiastically as he looked out the window, as he tapped his father's shoulder. 'It's snowing! It's really snowing! You have to look dad.'_

'_Remus, be quiet please, I'm trying to-'but the rest of what his father was going to say was cut off by the sudden slip of the car. After that everything just flashed by. Remus' father lost control of the car, and then they hid something, and everything went black…_

* * *

Remus woke up with a loud scream, trembling violently. He was sweaty and tears were dripping from his eyes onto his sheets. It was his fault that his parents had died, his fault alone…

Remus didn't even know at what point Sirius had come into his room, and pulled him into a hug to just let him cry. Sirius didn't talk, did not say one word. Sirius didn't ask him why he had screamed or why he was crying, he had just nodded with a sad smile. He had sat down on Remus' bed, and had pulled the teenage boy close to comfort him in nothing but silence.

'It's my fault… It's all my fault… Everything… It's my fault!'

* * *

**(1) It's from the song 'I miss you' sang by Darren Hayes.**

**Hope you all liked it... Let me know, that means you HAVE to review!!**

**XoXo**

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	8. Chapter 8

**Hi everyone... I can hardly believe I finaly finished this chapter! It took so long!! But I've been really busy with school and stuf... Thank you all for the amasing reviews! You're all just too good to be real... :D... This chapter is a bid longer than the usual, yet nothing really happens, or boys band a lot though, which is pretty good... Hopefully you'll all like it... **

**Oh and btw, a few weeks ago I got my results back, and I past all my exams !! (I know, I'm amazing :p, just need to update more !!)**

**disclaimer: I still don't own any off this, well obviously except the plot and Anna... :D **

**XoXo**

* * *

Remus woke up the next morning from the soft music that was playing in the living room. Somehow the teenager felt safer and warmer than he had done in years. He actually felt like he had more than just slept, he had rested. It was as if someone had looked over him, had been there for him…

Ignoring the music Remus snuggled deeper into is blankets, but with that hit something else that was lying in his bed. He soon realized that this thing in his bed had its arms draped around him. His head snapped to the other side, and he saw Sirius lying beside him. His eyes still shut close as a soft smile was playing on his sleeping face.

Suddenly Remus remembered what had happened the night before. His parents, the accident, all the pain and loss… Sirius had been there, had seen Remus cry and shake. Remus only now realized that Sirius had seen him like this, and it could not happen again. He couldn't be vulnerable around others…

Yet when he looked at the sleeping face of the man who was kind enough the offer Remus a roof above his head, Remus did not feel regret, he did not feel venerable. He felt relieved and calm. He was actually very willing to snuggle further into the other mans embrace, but his mind won it from his will to just crawl up against his roommate.

He got out of bed silently, and walked towards the door that led to the hallway of the apartment. Remus still had no idea how Sirius could afford a place like this, and how he could feed 3 people every day, and did not complain about it. Remus, however, had to admit that he actually liked living here. It somehow felt like a place he had not been to in a very long time, namely, home.

'Good morning Remus.' Anna said as she was happily washing the dishes. Anna really was something. She could be so mad at one moment and 6 seconds later she could be her own happy self. It was quiet scary really, but somehow Remus knew that Anna was just the way she was. She was probably born like this.

'Good morning.' Remus answered as he started helping her clean out the kitchen mess.

'It's weird that Sirius isn't out of bed yet… He normally rises quiet early.'

'Maybe he forgot to set his alarm…' Remus tried swallowing hard.

'That sounds like something he would do.' Anna said thoughtfully, than she shrugged, and didn't mention it again. She went back to her usual singing. How could one person know that many songs? 'It's not that I hate you, but I just can seem to love you, and the first time that I saw you… Oh my heart was beating fast… I think you might just be right for someone else, but in my life you're not… No way, no, no way… They say that I say… When I met you…'

* * *

Sirius woke up in a bed he instantly felt wasn't his own. As he opened his eyes he realized that he was in Remus' room, in Remus' bed. Sirius got the strange idea that he had done something terribly wrong. However after just a few seconds he remembered the night before. The young boys tears, his cries in the dark. It was a wonder that Anna didn't hear them, but then again she slept with her headphone on.

Remus had been so scared, and fearful. Something had happened; Sirius had known that ever since he saw that boy weeks ago. Now it just seemed even more obvious, and close. It was like the wall around Remus had suddenly become thinner, and easier to break through.

Somehow Sirius found the strength to get out of bed before Anna came looking for him, which would be all different kinds of levels of weird. He wondered if Remus was feeling better again. He hadn't even heard the boy leave this morning. What kind of protector was he anyway?

As he entered the kitchen, he saw that Anna was just getting ready to leave.

'Where do you think you're going?' Sirius asked, while he was still barely clothed.

'I'm going shopping with Lily and Alice.' Anna said, as if it was the most normal thing in the world. 'For Remus' schools plies and stuff, and baby stuff for little baby –whatever his name will be- longbottom.'

'And are you going to buy something for yourself as well?' Sirius looked at her as if he was the father sending her teenage daughter out shopping.

'Well, I saw this one bag I really, really want, but I'm not going to buy it.' Anna explained to her best friend, and even Remus could see that she actually hoped that Sirius would say she could buy it anyway. In many ways they actually seemed a married couple, above the fact that the really weren't. 'I'm already late, so goodbye! Play nice you two.' She smiled brightly at both Remus and Sirius while she put on her coat.

'Is it brown?' Sirius asked as Anna was about to leave the apartment.

'What?' Anna asked surprised.

'The bag, is it brown?' Sirius asked again, and Anna nodded. 'Well maybe you should buy it then?'

'Really?' Anna sounded really happy, and actually very surprised. It was Sirius' time to nod his head. 'Thanks Siri! I'll buy you something as well!' The young man smiled as his best friend left.

However the moment the door closed behind her an awkward silence fell over the seemingly empty apartment. Remus and Sirius stood there in the kitchen, Sirius suddenly very aware of the fact that he was again half-naked, and alone with Remus.

'So…' Remus broke the silence eventually, trying not to pay any attention to all the awkwardness. 'Why does she always have to say what she is going to buy?'

'Well she already lives here for free, and I pay for most of the food, and stuff.' Sirius asked. 'It's not that I care what she buys, and what she doesn't. It's more of a: make sure we get by every month.'

'Maybe the bag is really cheap.' Remus said with a shrug, Sirius however started grinning.

'I doubt that.' He said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. 'They're never cheap. But you should be the one worrying…'

'What do you mean?' Remus didn't really know what Sirius was getting at.

'Well, 3 women went to by your school supplies… They'll probably get you a pink notebook or something like that. You'll look so gay!' For a minute Sirius thought that Remus would not find any good answer to his rambling, but then Remus gave a wicked smile.

'So you think you would have been the better option? You'd buy everything with a rainbow motive, and honestly, that would be gay!'

Sirius could not help but smirk at Remus' words.

'You think you're so funny don't you?' He asked in a playfully angry tone, and Remus just nodded grinning wide. 'Oh just wait, I'll get you for that.'

Before they knew it they were running, laughing and chasing each other around the entire apartment. Sirius had to admit how fast Remus was, because he really didn't seem it.

'Remus if you come out now I'll buy you ice cream… We'll go see a movie… I'll give you a chocolate bar?' Sirius had lost track of Remus only minutes ago, but could not find the boy anywhere. He was now doing what every responsible adult would do, bribe the children! 'We'll play miniature golf? We can go to a book shop together? I'll cut my hair…'

Suddenly someone tapped his shoulder, and Sirius turned around in surprise. Remus was looking at him in disbelieve, with his eyebrows raised.

'Really?'

'Well…' Sirius stated… 'No, but, you know what? Got ya!!' Sirius arms snatched out to get Remus trapped.

'Oh! You cheat!' Remus said while he tried to sound mad. As Remus tried to squirm out of Sirius hold, which was harder than it seemed, he somehow fell over his own feet, and pushed down Sirius with him. As they got their breath back, Remus was glad to realize that he was no longer a prisoner of Sirius Black. Remus laughed while he pushed down Sirius' arms, and before he could even think of how weird this would sound he said: 'Who's on top now, Sirius?'

'Oh, Rem, if you wanted to be on top, all you had to do was ask!' Sirius added still laughing. It was just than that he realized that it was totally wrong. He looked at Remus his head which was hovering above him, his beautiful sort of amber eyes, his nose with those almost invisible freckles, and his soft mouth. It would have been so nice to be able to kiss them… To hold Remus close in a real and actual embrace. Sirius bit his bottom lip. He shouldn't be thinking this, he really shouldn't it was so wrong. Sirius was suddenly very aware of the fact that both of them were still wearing far to less to be on legal grounds here.

Only after Sirius' words Remus notices their totally inappropriate position. He watched Sirius carefully, realizing that he didn't feel as uncomfortable as he should have. He had to get up, didn't he? He couldn't get in trouble again, after all Remus knew that only bad things could happen from this. At the other hand, those gorgeous grey eyes looked at him in something different than Remus could remember over all those terrible years, he just didn't know what it was that was visible in Sirius' eyes. What it was that was so obviously there.

It seemed that they had been on the floor for hours, but in reality it only had been about a minute when Sirius coughed, and then spoke.

'So Although I'm not planning on getting my hair cut, maybe we could go and watch a movie? Or do something else?' Sirius who was trying to focus on everything but the boy who was still on top of him found the stain on the carpet suddenly very interesting.

'I'd love to go watch a movie.' Remus said as he got out of his own trance, and started moving to come to a stand. 'But miniature golf? What were you thinking?'

'What? I love miniature golf!' Sirius tried to sound offended.

'You really are a girl aren't you?' Remus added, and was glad the atmosphere had lightened again.

'Well next week we'll go play it, just to punish you…' Sirius said, as he was now standing too.

* * *

The movie seemed to have been a great idea. Remus just had to remind Sirius that he was 16 and not 6, because he had not really been willing to watch some new cartoon in theaters.

They went to see a movie called 'knowing' although Sirius seemed kind of reluctant that they did not want to watch 'Beverly hills' Chihuahua.'

Now that Sirius was actually sitting next to Remus who was watching the screen intently he was happy that he let Remus choose the movie. The boy's eyes were sparkling as he watched the screen while eating the popcorn Sirius had bought him earlier. Somehow Sirius knew that it had been a very long time since anyone had done stuff like this with him. Yet Remus deserved everything, the whole world…

'What's wrong?' The teenager asked as he was Sirius looking at him. Sirius just smiled and shook his head, as if to say: 'nothing.' Remus turned his head, and went back to watching the movie. Sirius too turned his head to the screen, although he could not help but watch Remus just now and then.

After the movie they went to get ice-cream, Remus his favorite flavor unsurprisingly was chocolate. They were sitting in the car driving back to the apartment. Sirius who mentioned that Anna still hadn't called him to check in tried not to sound too worried as he tried to sum the things they still had to get Remus.

'Somewhere I can live after all this is over I suppose.' Remus added when Sirius seemed to be done.

'What do you mean?' The young man asked surprised. 'You'll stay with us. You know that right?'

Remus looked up to Sirius in disbelieve.

'You don't have to take care of me you know.'

'I know I don't have to, Remus. I want to.' Sirius said it like it was the most obvious thing in the entire world. 'There will always be a place for you at my house.'

'I really appreciate that Sirius, but I can't expect you to take care of me until I can actually provide for myself.' Remus said continued their little debate. As Sirius pulled over he took Remus' arm to make the boy look up. Sirius wanted to say that he'd take care of him until the moment he died if he had to, that he never wanted Remus to leave his side again even if he could provide for himself. Yet all these words the man swallowed down deep and he uttered something else instead.

'If I couldn't afford to do it, I wouldn't say that I wanted to take care of you Remus. It's not an issue for me.' Sirius voice was clear, and Remus knew that he meant what he said, yet he really wasn't planning on dropping the issue.

'But you already take care of Anna; she even told me that she practically lives off you.' Remus continued. 'How will you possibly take care of the both of us?'

Sirius smiled at the teenage boy's hidden curiosity.

'Not that it's any of your business, I have, well, had an uncle who was quiet fond of me, and was very in touch with the way I chose to live my life, and seeing as he didn't have children himself he left everything he had to me. And you can trust me when I say that it's more than enough to provide for Anna and you.' Sirius explained, as Remus looked at him in disbelieve. As the boy didn't say anything else anymore Sirius smiled happily. 'Now that that is settled, you don't have to worry about that anymore. Just one thing if you want something, you'll just have to ask. Oh that reminds me, you'll need paint.' Sirius started to continue driving, as he had realized he had made sure Remus did have a place in their house.

'Paint?' The boy asked seemingly surprised.

'Yes, for your room Remus.' Sirius said a little annoyed. It had to be obvious right? 'We'll decorate it just the way you like. Anna will help you seeing as you prefer pink to rainbows.'

Sirius had expected a new debate over the fact he didn't have to decorate Remus' room, but the boy surprised him with a completely different and practically unrelated sentence.

'I never said I didn't prefer rainbows.'

* * *

'How late is it anyway?' Sirius asked Remus while they where cleaning the dishes about a half hour after dinner. They had a simple meal, but it had been amazing anyway. They had been laughing and talking the entire time. It almost seemed that they had been together their whole lives.

'I think it's a bid past 8…' Remus said as he walked to the living room to check. 'It's 10 past 8.' Remus added as he rejoined Sirius in the kitchen.

'Weird…' Sirius stated, as he searched for a sponge.

'It's Ten past 8 two times a day you know; it's not that weird…'

'No, I mean that Anna isn't home yet. She didn't even call. Maybe I should call her or Lily if she isn't back soon.' Sirius explained to Remus what he thought to be strange.

'She'll be home soon.' Remus said with a comforting voice. He hadn't actually realized that Anna was the reason Sirius had been watching the clock for half the day. Remus guessed that they really had a sort of special relationship, a very deep friendship… 'But if you want to, I can try to call her?'

'That's not neccessairy; I'll do it in a minute.' Sirius said smiling brighter again. It was obvious that he didn't want Remus to worry about Anna too. The weird thing was that now that Sirius had mentioned it Remus actually was worried. It was the first time since he could remember that he felt worried about the safety of another person than his own.

'So, James is your best friend right?' Remus asked trying to lighten to mood again.

Sirius soon started talking enthusiastically about how they had met, and how they had become best friends. He even told Remus how much Lily hated them in the beginning.

When Sirius eventually found the time to call Anna She didn't answer her phone, so he called Lily too. The young woman informed him that she had been home for hours, and that she had dropped of Alice before she had went home. She didn't have a clue where Anna was, which made Sirius even more worried then he already was. After all bad things did happen to good people, they all were the living proof of that fact.

'Lily doesn't know where she is.' Sirius said in a sad tone, as he came to sit next to Remus in the living room again.

'She'll be alright.' Remus stated again. 'Maybe she just saw an old friend or someone from her class.'

'Maybe you should go to bed.' Sirius said to Remus as he realized that it was getting late. Remus however shook his head.

'I'll stay with you. We can talk some more, and before you know it she'll be back.' Remus was too smart for his age.

Hours seemed to pass quickly as they spoke with each other. Although it was mostly Sirius who spoke, seeing as Remus didn't feel up to sharing his past life. Naturally Sirius left out details about his life as well… Well, details…

Before they knew it, it was long past midnight. They were both slumbering to sleep, and both had forgotten why it was they were there as they closed their eyes.

* * *

The door opened, and closed again as Anna walked into the apartment. The young woman found her best friend sleeping on the sofa with their new roommate the moment she entered their living room. Remus seemed so much more open as he was sleeping, and Anna smiled at the both of them. She went to her own bedroom quietly, and took an extra blanket from her closet, as she went back to the living room. She pulled the blanket over the both of them, as they were laying there in each other's arms, unknowingly to everyone, even to themselves. Before she went to her bedroom once again she planted a kiss on their foreheads, saying goodnight, and apologizing for being home so late.

'I'll explain in time.' She promised, as she turned off the living room light that has still been burning.

* * *

**And now that I've done my job for today... It's time for TEMPTATION ISLAND!!**

**Hope you all liked it. let me know !! **

**read and review plzz !! **

**XoXo**

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	9. Chapter 9

_**HI everyone!! Thanks for the reviews, you've been good to me. If I forgot to reply to any of you plz forgive me. I've had a really bad headache the last couple of days, and I know that's why I should be in bed right now, but I really wanted to finish this chapter. I've been writing and rewriting it ever since I started the storie ... I don't really know how it turned out, and it might contain a few mistaked, I'm kind of seeing double right now, so I didn't really feel like checking the text ten times... Of course I could have done the sensible thing, and wait untill I felt better, but as I already said I didn't want to. Hopefully you'll like it anyway... The chapter contains bits about the past and their present... I believe it's kind of a key chapter, and well you'll see...**_

**_much love_**

**_XoXo_**

_**disclaimer: as usual I have to say that I don't own any of this, just the plot i guess...**_

_

* * *

_

_Sirius wasn't sure where he was. He didn't know what had happened. He couldn't see anything but him; he couldn't think about anything else but get out of this place. To get away from him, Sirius needed to get away from him. Yet all he could see was the man he thought had loved him, the man he had loved… _

'_Siri were are you?' Anna's voice came from the hallway. 'Are you home already? I arrived together with James. He wanted to talk to you.'_

'_Fuck it.' Chris hissed darkly. There was only hatred in his eyes, as he watched Sirius crumble on the floor of the room. _

'_Siri?' He heard Anna's voice again, but he couldn't answer. Why couldn't they find him? He felt his last breath slipping away as the blood kept pouring on the floor. _

'_I hate you.' Sirius said towards the young man hovering over him, the knife still in his hands. Sirius had to use all the power he had to even speak, his words barely a whisper, but they were louder than any scream could have ever been. 'I hate you.' _

'_Sirius, where are you?' It was James, Sirius knew it. They were close now. They would rescue him. It would all be over. The room was tumbling again. There was nothing he could do… He wanted to sleep, wanted it all to go away. He saw the door open, and the bit of light that came from behind it. After that everything went black._

* * *

'So I'll see you tonight then?' Anna asked in a pleasant voice, different from her normal tone, yet seemingly very happy, Remus noticed as he passed her half-opened room. 'I can't wait…'

Even though Remus realized that It was a private conversation he could not help but stop in the middle of the hallway.

'No, you don't have to pick me up… I'll see you at the restaurant.' Anna continued, still sounding amazingly happy. She had a very different tone that when she spoke to either Sirius, any of their other friends, or even to himself. This person had to be different to her. 'Bye, see you soon!'

As the conversation was over Remus made sure he was out of the hallway, and into the kitchen before Anna realized that he had been eavesdropping.

It had been a few days after Anna's mysterious disappearance, and it was finally Monday morning, the first day of school for Remus. He had to admit that it felt weird going back to school. It wasn't the fact that he didn't go to school in the past, which he had done, but more of the fact that there were actually people supporting him now.

Anna usually was the one making sure that everything fell into place, while Sirius… Well, Remus wasn't really sure what it was that Sirius did. He put things out of place, but in a good way. He was the one that made Remus question his ideas on the world, Sirius gave him life again, a new spirit. It was something like that at least.

'So you're done getting ready?' Sirius asked as he saw Remus enter the room looking deep in thought. Remus looked up to the young man smiling, and nodded. 'What would you like to eat?' Sirius went on, trying to start a conversation.

'It doesn't really matter.' Remus answered, he was too nervous to eat anyway.

* * *

'_Anna! Help me! Call a doctor or the hospital, anything!' James yelled in terror. He pulled out his gun towards the man standing over Sirius. 'Get back you. Drop the knife, and keep your hands up.' _

_For a moment the only thing anyone could hear was the knife dropping, the footsteps Chris placed away from Sirius' seemingly lifeless body. James walked over to his best friend kneeling besides him. He could see the wound, all the blood… It was terrible. As he tried to take Sirius his pulse he heard footsteps again, assuming that they were Anna's he yelled at her again._

'_Call the police as well…' James said as he looked up to see Chris standing right before him again. 'What the-'the man gave him a kick, knocking James to the ground for just a moment, as Chris took James' gun. _

'_You think you're so smart don't you?' Chris said in his smug voice. 'He got what he deserved, and now so will you.' _

'_I'm not really sure about that.' James said standing up from the ground again, as Anna quietly entered the room and took the knife from the floor._

'_Drop it.' A voice unlike James and Chris had ever heard came from behind Chris. It was the coldest tone James ever remembered hearing. 'Drop it, or I will stab you, just like you stabbed him.'_

_For a minute James thought Chris would try to fight of Anna as well, but then he dropped the gun again. He turned to Anna, and James could see that there was more hate in the man's eyes than should be humanly possible. Anna on the other hand didn't show any emotion whatsoever._

'_Will he be alright?' Anna asked James as if they weren't talking about Sirius' life._

'_Yes I think so. The wound seems pretty deep but I think he only really got flesh.' James explained hurriedly not knowing how Anna could choose now to start acting like an ice queen. _

'_In about 10 minutes the police and the ambulance will be here. I suggest you leave now.' Anna said to Chris stepping away to let him pass. As well Chris as James, looked at her as if she had gone crazy. _

'_Go now, and don't ever return.' Anna continued. 'Because if you do I swear to god I will kill you, and I'll enjoy it.'_

'_What are you doing Anna?' James asked here as he stood there half dumb struck, and Chris was making sure Anna wouldn't kill him right here and now. 'He deserves to go to prison.' _

'_Humans you put in prison James, animals you let run free.' Anna stated simply. 'Besides he will turn himself in.' Again both the man looked surprised. _

'_I was right. You're even weirder than you seem.' Chris sneered._

'_You will turn yourself in, because at least in jail you'll be certain I won't try to murder you in your sleep.' Anna still seemed to be incredibly calm, like she was just some cold hearted person talking about nothing more than the weather. 'Goodbye.'_

_Then she walked over to the place where Sirius was lying. Chris finally ran out of the room._

'_Let him go, James.' Anna said in a different tone, as she kneeled next to Sirius' body. 'Everything will be ok.' Her voice was soft again, full of love and concern. 'I promise. We'll get through this as well. It's not that hard. You'll be even stronger in the end.'_

* * *

'Are you sure this is what you want?' Sirius asked again as he pulled to a stop only meters from the entrance of Remus' new school. The young boy nodded giving Sirius an honest smile. 'If anything happens go straight to Lily.'

'Sir-'Remus started, but Sirius cut him off not noticing that Remus wanted to say something.

'Oh, and before I forget, I bought you a cell phone.' Sirius stated as he searched for the thing on the backseat, and handed it to Remus. 'Call me if you need something, or if something goes wrong.'

'I'll be-'Remus tried again, but without any real success.

'Come straight here after school. Anna will pick you up at half past 3. Understood?' Sirius was rambling like mad, and Remus nodded again not knowing what else to do. The young boy was really stunned that Sirius seemed so serious (for lack of a better word).

'Oh and, here is lunch money, you know you should eat-'Sirius started again after he had taken a few deep breaths.

'Sirius, will you listen to me?' Remus said very loudly, and Sirius' eyes snapped up as he came out of his trance. 'I'll be ok.'

The older man nodded, and started smiling.

'I know.' He stated eventually. 'Now go, before I change my mind.'

Remus opened the door of the car, and took his bag. Before he got out of the car however he changed his mind and looked back at Sirius. Before either of them knew what was really happening Remus leaned in giving Sirius a soft peck on his cheek.

'Thanks.' The boy said with a light blush as he pulled back again, and left before Sirius could even think about something to say…

* * *

_The trip to the hospital was long and hard. James called his girlfriend Lily and their other close friend Peter as Anna did everything she could to get a hold of her own boyfriend Evan. _

'_Why did you do that Anna?' James asked still believing that Anna had gone completely mental. _

'_As I already told you James, you don't imprison animals.' The young women stated once more as she dialed Evan number for what seemed to be the 1OOth time. _

'_Evan, it's me.' Anna said towards the answering machine, as James continued to drive after the ambulance. 'Please call me back as soon as you can. I'm almost at the city hospital. Sirius is off pretty bad.'_

_As Anna put the phone down and looked worried outside the window, James knew that she had been right all along. There was only one thing that mattered… that was their best friend, Sirius. _

* * *

As Remus got shown his classroom he entered a bit too late. His first class of the day was chemistry, and Remus already knew it would be a disaster. He hated chemistry, and was terrible at it. It had been the only subject at school b far that Remus failed, the one subject that gained him something else than grates…

He gave a soft knock on the door, feeling as nervous as he knew Sirius was feeling as he dropped him off. It wasn't the first time however that Remus had gone to a new school.

'Come in.' a hard voice said. It was definitely a young man, but seemingly not e very pleasant one. As Remus opened the door 24 pair of eyes started looking at him, including those of the teacher. God that man needed a bath, or shampoo or something. He has black hair just like Sirius, but Sirius who did everything in his power to keep his hair as perfect as hair could possibly be was quite the opposite of this man. 'You're late. It's a good start for you mister Lupin. Let's make one thing clear as you are entering my class: you will not take on the habits of the people who took responsibility for you. Although it's already hard to believe that the two of them can be responsible for anything.'

Was that man actually talking about Sirius and Anna? He really couldn't be. They had been the nicest people Remus had ever known, after his parents of course.

'I will be on time next time, but the women that showed me the classroom had to make a stop at her office.' Remus explained.

'No excuses mister Lupin. You can sit down at the back of the room, and next to you speak to me you will address me with mister Snape, understood?' The man asked already turning around.

'Yes, sir…' Remus answered. His name was Snape? Where had he known that name before? As he started walking towards his seat he suddenly remembered. 'Sniviless…'

The man turned around abruptly.

'What did you just say?' His eyes were cold with hatred.

'Nothing…' Remus said in a quiet voice.

'Nothing, who?' The man continued, sneering at Remus…

'Nothing, sir.' Remus repeated.

'Watch it, you.' The young teacher stated almost hissing his words, as he seemingly forgot that he had a class full of students. 'And sit down!'

After chemistry Remus thought his day could only get better from her on, but he hadn't thought about the other students yet. His classmates hadn't said a word to him, and Remus didn't really matter. Now however he was walking towards his next class alone, and as he was trying to find the way he bumped into someone.

'My apologies.' Remus stated looking for the plan he had dropped.

'Well well… If it isn't the new kid? My brother told me you'd show up.'

'Excuse me?' Remus asked, not knowing who this girl was, and where she was going with this.

'You're the one living with those to freaks aren't you?' The girl went on. 'The backstabbing bitch and her disgusting diseased freak of nature.'

'He's not a freak of nature, and he sure as hell isn't diseased or disgusting.' Remus stated in something that felt a lot like upcoming rage. Where had that so suddenly come from?

'Are you protecting your boyfriend? Maybe you're a freak of nature yourself.' The girl went on, towering over him without any difficulty. 'Maybe I should teach you that it's wrong…'

'Mathews?' A guy who seemed to be the girl's age came over to the girl, and as she looked around, Remus made his way out of sight. As he left he saw the older boy wink at him over the girls' shoulder…

* * *

_Anna, James, Lily, Peter and Patty, (Peter's girlfriend) were waiting together in the emergence waiting room. All of them very stressed out, and scared for their friend of many years. The room was the coldest place in the entire world to all of them; they were scared, cold and tired. They just wanted an answer, for Sirius to be alright, but no one came to tell them. No doctor, no nurse, no one. _

'_It will be alright.' Lily said to her boyfriend, who was looking quiet terrible. 'He'll be ok.' _

'_I hope so.' James said in a distant voice as he looked around the room. Anna was still trying to call Evan, even though you couldn't in a hospital. Peter was softly talking with Patty, they were in the middle of moving out of state, and were here in no time. Even Patty, who had not known Sirius that well, seemed completely taken aback by what had happened earlier that night. _

_Suddenly someone stormed into the room. _

'_Honey!' Evan looked relieved the moment he saw Anna. 'I came as soon as I heard your message. Are you alright?' _

_The young woman nodded, as she came towards him and hugged him tightly. _

'_It's Sirius. He's been stabbed. I'm really scared Ev.' Anna explained without letting go of her boyfriend. 'What if he won't be ok?'_

'_It'll all work itself out sweetheart.' Evan stated as he looked around the room and saw the rest of his girlfriend's friends. He didn't even nod to them. 'But you shouldn't be here. You've been through a lot. You need rest.'_

'_But I don't want to leave! I need-'Anna started but was soon cut off by Evan._

'_You need to come with me, and get some rest. You can come back tomorrow.' Evan stated, not having heard a word that Anna had said. 'You can sleep at my house tonight, and we'll go get some stuff off you tomorrow at the apartment.'_

'_But-'Anna tried to continue, tried to make Evan see that she could not leave Sirius._

'_No buts! You need some sleep.' Evan went on. 'I don't want you hanging here the whole night.'_

_Peter tapped Anna's shoulder._

'_If we hear something we'll call you instantly. I promise.' The man stated with tired eyes. Anna nodded, thanking her friend with her eyes. _

'_That's settled than. Come on darling we're going home.' Evan already started walking out of the room, again completely ignoring Anna's friends, not even caring if Sirius was alright._

'_Good night.' Lily said to Anna with worried eyes._

'_See you tomorrow.' As Anna wanted to hug her friend, she heard Evan call from the hallway._

'_Are you still coming?' He was very impatient, and Anna made an apologetic look and she too left the room. Leaving everything that was important to her behind she eventually stepped into her boyfriend's car, tears dripping from her eyes as she couldn't suppress her fear of losing one of them, especially not the one person she cared so much about, her best friend, her roommate, Sirius..._

* * *

Remus was sitting in the school bathroom feeling terrible. Teenagers could be so terrible people. They didn't even know them, and already thought he was a freak. That gave no good prospect for the future. He had been sitting there for what seemed the whole lunch break. He felt like throwing up, and already leaving, but he couldn't. Somehow he wanted to prove that he was normal, even if he really wasn't.

A soft knock on the door caught Remus by surprise.

'It's occupied.' He yelled towards the person at the other end of the door.

'I know.' He heard a friendly male voice; it was a nice surprise after all those others. 'I came looking for you. You're the new kid right?'

'Yes…' Remus said as casually as he could.

'We have chemistry together. I thought it was really stupid the way he treated you.' The boy still seemed friendly. 'Could you maybe open the door? I won't do anything, I'm not like Mathews.'

After a second of doubt Remus slowly opened the door ready for anything, but the only thing he seemed to find was a boy with bright blond hair, and deep blue eyes. He was definitely Remus' age although he wasn't as skinny as Remus, and he definitely was taller.

'Do you know that girl?' Remus asked as he saw the others encouraging smile.

'Everyone knows that girl. She's one year above us, and she can do whatever she wants just because her brother is on the school board.' The young boy explained. 'By the way, I'm Paul.' The boy extended his hand, and Remus took it after another second of doubt. He really wasn't in a place to turn down friends.

'My name's Remus.'

'I know…' The boy stated still smiling, and to his own surprise Remus found he was smiling back. 'And don't worry I don't mind that you live with someone who is gay. I know from experience you can't catch 'gayness' like a disease or something. My brother's gay, and I'm not, so that definitely shows that. Not that I would mind you being gay. I'm rambling… I'm going to stop now…'

'You should introduce me to your brother sometimes.' Remus said in a friendly voice still smiling. Paul looked at Remus and nodded.

'Chris would be delighted.'

* * *

_**Let me know what you did think about the chapter...**_

_**I want to know all your thoughts and desires! (I'm just kidding... Or not...)**_

_**Read and review plzzz :p**_

_**love you guys so much **_

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	10. Chapter 10

**__**

HI everyone !!

**_I hope you're all doing al right. Thank you for all the reviews... You guys are just too good for me... It took me far longer than expected to post this chapter... It had another shot of Remus' ver miserable past, and hopefully very bright future... I hope I didn't overdo... I think the chapter is quiet terrible, honestly. I really didn't want to post it, and maybe I'll rewrite it, but seeing as I feel terrible as sick people ask me to update and I don't I updating anyways... _**

**_Hopefully you'll think it's at least a bit Ok... plzz let me know... _**

**_disclaimer: well you guys know the drill, I own noothing what so ever... All tha caracters are the hard work off miss rowling !!_**

**_XoXo_**

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* * *

'How was school?' Anna asked excited as Remus entered her car. Remus opened his mouth to answer, but got stunned as he saw Anna

'You look amazing.' He said after a few moments of silence. Anna started smiling brightly.

'You really think so?' She asked him in surprise. She was wearing a black dress, and very nice black stilettos (which couldn't be very helpful with the driving). Although it wasn't the kind of weather for it. She obviously had been to the hairdresser, and was wearing light make-up, which made her eyes come out brilliantly. Remus just nodded. He had never seen Anna like this before. Of course she was always cautious of what she wore, but not like this. This definitely was done on purpose, so that she would look good. 'Thank you Remus. But you still have to tell me how school went.'

'Well I met a really annoying girl, and my chemistry teacher hates me… but other than that it was quiet ok.' Remus said smiling. He had spent most of the afternoon in Paul's company and it had been great to be able to talk to someone who was his own age.

'Did you make any friends?' Anna asked, and Remus nodded again still smiling at the young woman in the car. 'And was there anyone in particular that caught your attention?'

Remus looked at Anna with big eyes hoping that he had understood her wrong. He shook his head no suddenly feeling very uncomfortable. Anna seemed like the nosy mother-type kind of person when it came to Remus. However there was nothing much to know, or to tell. Remus hadn't really given attention to other people that much, to actually 'let his attention get caught'.

'Where are you going tonight?' Remus asked Anna as she started the car, ready to begin driving and shoot some more questions.

'No where.' She answered suddenly not looking at Remus any more as if she was trying to hide something.

'Come on Anna…' Remus continued, remembering the conversation he had hurt earlier that day. 'You don't dress up like that to stay at home…'

'I'm just going out with some friends from my class, that's all… You don't have to worry about that.' Anna said, but Remus knew she was just making up some story. He could see it, feel it, and hear it in her voice. Anna didn't like lying, and she wasn't very good at it either…

* * *

Days passed fleetingly as Remus went to school, and before anyone had actually felt it his first week had come and went. Sirius picked him up, and Anna came to get him. They were always right on time. Both of them were really cautious about him.

It was Sunday night as Sirius told him he should get to bed early. Remus could hardly figure out what it was about Sirius. One moment he could try to be the adult, and send him sleeping or made him eat his vegetables, or worried about him like hell, and the other he could act without a moment of thought…

'Good night then…' Remus said to Sirius and Anna, who was studying at the living room table. She looked really tired, and Remus thought it to be better that Sirius would send her to bed rather than him.

'Goodnight Rem…' Sirius smiled to him, and somehow Remus felt that need again, the need to lean in and kiss him again. However Remus didn't, he just swallowed deep willing the feeling to go away. 'And don't cheat, I'll come and look if you're in bed!'

'Yes dad…' Remus answered sarcastically. He couldn't believe how comfortable he was starting to feel around them. For the very first time, in a very long time he felt like he had an actual family again. However that didn't mean that he should be treated like a small child.

'Goodnight Remus.' Anna said smiling at the teenage boy. 'Listen to you grandfather…'

Remus couldn't help but laugh at Anna's words as he started to leave the room.

'I never could have guessed that about you…' Anna said thoughtfully as she heard Remus bedroom door close only moments later.

'What?' Sirius asked not knowing what Anna meant.

'That you could be so severe…' The young woman smiled putting her book aside, and taking of her glasses. 'I'm going to get ready for bed too; I'm really up for a good and long night off sleep.'

The bid each other goodnight and Anna left Sirius alone another ten minutes later. Sirius who really wasn't feeling up to be all alone went to bed himself not long after Anna had left him. He however kept his promise, and went to check up on Remus. The boy was already sleeping, and Sirius couldn't help but watch the boy for what seemed like eternity. Remus always looked so peaceful when he was sleeping. He was so incredibly beautiful. Sirius thought it to be the perfect sight, yet he knew he had to stop thinking like that. Remus was only now really starting to trust him, and he could never betray his trust.

* * *

_The moon was full, and Remus knew what that meant as he came down the stairs after his foster parent had called for him. With every step he was trying to suppress his tears. Remus was ready for what would happen, he always thought he was. And even if he wasn't he had to be. _

'_Get down here_ _now my little whelp.' The_ _voice called again, making Remus shiver in fear. Why did it happen all the time? Why couldn't he just crawl under a stone and die?_

_Every step he took was a step closer to the most terrible place on earth. Remus walked silently across the hallway, and into a room that was once a living room. A cage stood in the corner… Remus looked at the thing with more hate and fear than he could ever have imagined feeling. _

_The man closed the door behind Remus, and Remus knew just by the way he started calling out to him that it would be another terrible night. _

_Hours passed as Remus felt the man's belt repeatedly hid his flesh. Some wounds were so bad that they couldn't stop bleeding. _

'_What do you need to say?' The man towered over him, and Remus knew he had never been so scared in his entire life. _

'_Please …' the boy said in a weak voice. 'Send me to where I belong.' _

'_Get in your cage!' The man yelled hitting Remus once again with the belt he used as his personal whip. Remus crawled towards the dog cage, almost happy that it was finally over. 'Faster!'_

_Remus cried out in pain. He wanted to leave, he had to leave. He had to find a way out._

* * *

Remus woke up bathing in sweat once again, screaming to let him go, and begging for freedom...

He felt sick, and panicked as he didn't immediately realize where he was. He hadn't had the nightmare in a while now, and he couldn't remember being as livid as the day it had happened…

However as moments past he realized where he was, and what he was doing in this place. Feeling very afraid Remus got out of bed silently. He knew he shouldn't do this, knew it would only make matters worse, but he wanted to feel safe. He had to feel safe. Just for one night, one night without having to worry. He walked across the hall, and he came to stand before the door opposite of that of Anna's. It was Sirius' room, and Remus knew he shouldn't have entered, that he should turn around while he still could. Yet he didn't. After a soft knock, he opened the door.

The room was dark, nothing more than the street lights entered the room. Closing the door Remus made his way over to Sirius' bed.

'Sirius?' Remus asked first quietly, but harder as soon as he realized that it wasn't working. 'Sirius, please wake up.'

After a few moments Sirius opened his sleepy eyes.

'Remus?' He asked in surprise. He came to sit, and turned on the light on his bedside table 'What are you doing here?'

As soon as Sirius had asked the question, he found the answer. Remus' eyes were red, as if he had just cried. He was all sweaty, and he was obviously very scared.

'Did you have another nightmare?' Sirius asked, and Remus nodded while he held back the tears he felt rising again.

'Can I please stay?' Remus asked after he bit his lip. Sirius nodded.

'Of course you can stay. Remus you don't even have to ask.' Sirius answered, a bid too soon he had to admit later on, but in that moment as he saw the teenage boy sitting on his bed almost scared to death he didn't particular care. 'Get under the covers its cold.'

Remus did what he was told, even though doing it felt really weird.

'It will be alright, I promise.' Sirius whispered as Remus' shivering, almost trembling body was close to his own.

'Don't leave me…' Remus said as he felt he couldn't hold back the tears any longer… Before Sirius knew what he was doing, or had time to think about the right thing to do he wound his arms around Remus pulling him into a hug. He was shushing him again, and somehow he knew that it did make a difference for Remus, and it always would…

* * *

As they were driving to school the next morning, the car only filled with complete silence Remus couldn't help but wonder why there always had to be something like aftermath. They once again felt uncomfortable with each other. Remus didn't want it to be like this. He knew he shouldn't have done what he did, but he couldn't help it. In fact, thinking back to how safe he had felt sleeping on Sirius arm he found he'd do it again in no time. But he wouldn't do it anymore. The silence wasn't worth it.

Sirius hadn't spoken to Remus all morning, and he felt terrible about it. When he had woken up in the morning he had left Remus lying in his bed, and went off to make breakfast, and calling up Anna who had already left. He even tried to ignore Remus being in the apartment for as long as he could. When it was time for school he had told Remus that they had to leave, and that was it. They had been sitting in the car for almost 10 minutes now, and hadn't said a word to each other. It shouldn't be this weird, they hadn't done anything wrong.

As Remus' school got closer, both of them realized that they had to say something, but who would be the first one to speak?

Sirius pulled over the car only minutes later, a few meters away from the gate.

'Make sure your not late in chemistry again.' HE stated not looking at Remus.

'I won't.' The teenager answered as he watched Sirius looking out of the window. Remus opened the door, and wanted to get out of the car, when Sirius took his arm. Remus' eyes snapped up once again looking straight into those that belonged to Sirius.

'Meet me here at noon. I'm taking you out to lunch.' Sirius stated without thinking. He had to start doing that, and fast. It wasn't a question, yet Remus nodded too stunned to do anything else. Yet he started smiling after a few seconds. At least he Sirius wasn't disgusted with him... Sirius started smiling as well, finally feeling the air lighten around them.

'But don't you have to work?' Remus asked after a moment of thought. Sirius already had stayed home a lot when he started living there.

'I have to eat don't I?' Sirius asked Remus as if it said everything. Of course he had to eat, but he could do that at his office as well. Remus just nodded not knowing what else he could do. 'Be good and blow up Snape for me will you.'

'I'll try…' Remus said nodding towards the older man, feeling the need again to lean in and kiss him, but he didn't want to jinx that they were talking again. 'I'll see you at lunch. '

* * *

Remus' morning passed relatively uneventful. He and Paul sat together in Chemistry and English, and Remus realized that Paul talked even more during class, then outside of it. Remus didn't really mind. He didn't really like talking that much, and preferred listening.

'Why are you going out to lunch anyway?' Paul asked as Lily was trying to explain something about Shakespeare.

_Because I can't stay out of my social worker's bed…_

'We still have to arrange al lot, transfer my address and stuff…' Remus lied almost invisibly. He was far better than Anna was at lying, but who wasn't?

'Oh…' Paul said thoughtfully. 'Where are you going to live than?'

Remus swallowed deep. Wouldn't it be weird to tell him that he would stay with Sirius? He didn't really have a choice though, Paul would find out sooner or later.

'I'm going to stay with Sirius.' Remus answered quietly.

'Really?' Paul asked surprised, yet seemingly enthusiastic. 'Do you like living there?'

'Yes, I kind of do.' Remus said gently smiling at his friend, and classmate.

It went quiet for a while as they listened to Lily's statement about theater and the popular culture.

'Oh have you heard the news already?' Paul asked after about 10 minutes. Remus knew had had enough of what Lily had to tell. Remus shook his head still trying to listen to what she was saying. He didn't want Lily to tell Anna and Sirius that he didn't really pay attention in class, and he had a feeling she would certainly tell them.

'You know Mathews' boyfriend right?' Paul asked. He was seemingly fond of gossip. Remus nodded, but was now actually listen carefully. He still remembered the boy with brown hair that saved him from her terrible grasp, and had winked at him... 'He broke up with her over the weekend. Apparently they got into a huge fight. Mathews isn't even at school today, I heard from some people that her best friend had said that she had been crying ever since…' Remus, although he knew that he shouldn't, felt that she got what she deserved. She wasn't better than any of them, and she shouldn't go around bullying random people…

* * *

'So…' Sirius said as he was sitting opposite of Remus once again. The man didn't know what he wanted to say, what he wanted to make sure.

'So…' Remus repeated, not knowing where this conversation was going.

Somehow both of them didn't know what to tell the other. They didn't want to make things weirder between them than they already were.

'Remus…' Sirius started eventually as the waiter had shook them out of there trance with the food he brought. 'If there is anything you feel like talking about you can you know. I will never judge you.'

Remus looked at Sirius in confusion. This was not what he had expected.

'I know that.' Remus confided in the older man. He gave a soft smile, as he felt something in the pit of his stomach which he could not place, but it was a good feeling nonetheless

'So what do you think about the spaghetti?' Sirius asked lighting the mood.

'Yours is better!' Remus said laughing at his roommate. However Remus was glad Sirius didn't ask him exactly why he crawled into his bed last night the teenager decided not to do it again ever…

Yet as night fell, and Remus couldn't find sleep again as he was scared to death he found himself walking over to Sirius' room once again. He didn't want to, he knew that he should turn around, he wanted to, but he couldn't. He couldn't turn around. He had to feel safe once more…

Just one more night would be enough, Remus told himself. After this night it would be enough… It would be the last night, it had to be.

* * *

**Don't hate me if you thought it was terrible too, in all fairness I did warn you !!**

**Plz lett me know... **

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	11. Chapter 11

Hi everyone!!

My apologies for the very long wait, but it has just been one disdaster after an other. My own laptop hs even crashed recently... I hope you can still forgive, and keep reading on the story because I've actualy finisheda few chapters... And for those who are intrested I recently finished my first year at law school... :)

In this one we celebrate remus' birthday... I hope you like it, and I hope you let me know... Plz read en review... :)

XoXo

BB

Disclaimer: still own nothing... :(

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'Why can't we just wake him up?' Remus heard a voice coming from the living room area; he instantly recognized it as Anna's. Remus, although he didn't want to know why, found himself in Sirius' bed once again. It had become an almost daily event as he crawled out of his own bed almost every night just to crawl in Sirius'.

'It's Saturday, It's the only day he can really sleep out.'

'Well, it's also the only day I can sleep out…' Anna stated sarcastically, not knowing why Sirius didn't want her to wake up their young companion. 'And you woke me at 7 am…'

'It's not my fault you were only back at 3 am!' Sirius snapped at the young woman he thought to be the sister he never had… 'Where were you anyway?'

'I was –'Anna Started trying to come up with something fast. 'Studying at the library… Exams are coming up…' She hoped Sirius wouldn't catch the lie, for if he did she wouldn't have anything to celebrate today.

Remus who slowly got out of bed, as he realized Anna wanted to wake him, walked out of Sirius' bedroom as fast as he could, and went into the direction of the noise.

'You hate studying at the library at night.' Sirius noted not noticing Remus coming into the room.

'I didn't have a choice… It's a study group thing…' Anna lied again, and Sirius now quirked an eyebrow.

'You're in a study group?' He asked with more disbelieve than wonderment in his voice, and Anna knew trouble was ahead. Remus realized that Anna was very uncomfortable, and cleared his throught.

'Remus, you're up?' Anna and Sirius looked shocked at the teenager. 'We wanted to surprise you…'

'You did?' Remus asked in wonderment, not knowing what the occasion was.

'Yes!' Anna said happily, and at the same time relieved... She and Sirius looked at each other once again, and then back at Remus with huge grins on both their faces.

'Happy birthday!'

* * *

Remus couldn't even believe it an hour later when Sirius was off to the bakery, and Anna was preparing the living room, because they would go camping/picnicking… They had actually thought that about the fact that it was his birthday, they actually wanted to celebrate his birthday… Remus could hardly even remember having a birthday celebration.

'Why are we going to camp inside again?' Remus asked as Anna tried to move the sofa by herself, and he joined in to help her out.

'Because it's raining outside…' She answered him with a shrug. 'We always go picnicking on birthday's… Its tradition and seeing as you're now part of this dysfunction we like to call family it is only right that you got to know our tradition. We'll invite your friends over next week if you'd like that, or you can go somewhere else with them. I'm sure Sirius won't mind…' Anna said smiling at the now seventeen year old. Remus couldn't help but smile as he felt bits of happiness rush over him. There family might have been a bid dysfunctional, but at least it was a family. 'Put on some music would you, I'm going insane.'

Remus looked up at Anna, and only now realized, that there wasn't any music playing which he had come very accustom to since he started living here.

'What do you want to hear?' Remus asked, as he walked over to the CD-player.

'Doesn't really matter…' Anna said thoughtfully. 'As long as I know it, it's all good!'

Remus thought that that eliminated a total of zero songs. The song Anna didn't know still had to be written. He eventually chose for a CD that said 'Anna's spare time compilation' as he entered it, and pressed play music filled the room.

'Oh, nice pick.' Anna said as she started singing along immediately. 'Story of my life, searching for the right, but it keeps avoiding me…'

While the song was about half way through Anna reminded herself of the fact that she still had to go get the mattresses from the beds. Remus shook his head in disbelief but started helping anyway.

Minutes past fleetingly, as they brought the mattresses to the living room. Anna just noted that you could hardly see that Remus slept in his bed, which had made Remus laugh uncomfortable.

'The only thing we have to do know is make a fire.'

'What? You want to make a fire inside of the house?' Remus asked in disbelief. 'Sirius will kill you if you burn the place down…'

'That's why I thought of a solution.' She said mysterious, as she walked over to the television. She flicked a few buttons, and there it was a campfire on the TV-screen.

* * *

When Sirius came in he found Anna and Remus in the living room, having a pillow fight. He doesn't go without saying he joined in soon after. Remus couldn't remember having this much fun on his birthday, or even having fun on his birthday at all. That was why, when Sirius realized he had forgotten something at the bakery Remus offered to walk over and get it.

While he was waiting in line about 2 minutes later his eyes fell on the guy who was standing about two feet away from him. Remus instantly recognized him as Mathews' ex boyfriend, but couldn't figure out what his name was.

'Is there a reason you're staring at me? Or am I just nice to look at?' A voice caught Remus by surprise, and he turned a bright shade of red as he realized who it was that as talking to him.

'I was just wondering what your name was, seeing as I know you from school.' Remus answered suddenly a bid uneasy with the whole situation.

'All you had to do was ask.' The slightly older boy said a bright smile spreading across his face. 'It's Mikah.'

Mikah… Remus thought it to be a very nice name. It suited his school-boyish charm. Mikah had soft blond hair, a bid to fluffy but nice nonetheless. He had big blue eyes, unlike Sirius stormy grey once they seemed to show the bottom of a bright open sea. Mikah was also taller then Remus, although not much. The boy somehow had a natural flair about him...

'Nice to meet you again, Mikah.' Remus said eventually now also smiling a bid more reassured at the other teenager.

'Nice to meet you again too, Remus right?' Remus nodded in surprise. He hadn't expected that Mikah already knew his name.

As they talked the crowd tinned, and soon Mikah was up to order. Not long after the second woman behind the counter was ready to take Remus'. Remus explained that Sirius had forgotten a cake he was supposed to have picked up. The woman just nodded, and went to get the cake from the back. Remus thanked her, and as he was made ready to leave he found Mikah still waiting for him.

'Having a party?' Mikah asked smiling that smile of his, and Remus had to admit the other boy was pretty attractive.

'It's my birthday today, actually.' Remus explained with a shrug.

'Oh, Congratulations!' For a second Remus thought Mikah was going to hug him or something, but the boy obviously held back somewhere in the middle. 'Now I feel bad I didn't buy you anything.' His expression one of fake same, but when Remus wanted to assure him that it was nothing he Mikah continued and the boy's expression changed like the weather. 'Let me make it up to you next Friday.'

'What?' It was the second time in mere minutes that Mikah took Remus by surprise.

'You know…' Mikah started, he obviously thought Remus hadn't comprehended what he was saying. 'Dinner and a movie or something like that. It will be fun.' Remus however didn't really know what to think of it, let alone what to say, and when he was about to decline the invitation the other boy continued fast: 'I won't take no for an answer, and I really don't want to see you try squirm out of our date so I'm leaving right now. I'll call you.'

Mikah turned around, and Remus felt more confused then he thought he should. Since when was this a date?

'You don't have my number.' Remus yelled after Mikah, mentally hitting himself for the stupidest question ever.

'Oh don't worry Remus. I have my way of getting the things I want.' The slightly older teenager said with a mischievous smile which somehow reminded him of Sirius and James when they were together. 'See you at school…'

Remus also said his goodbye's and made his way back home.

* * *

'That took longer than expected.' Anna stated when Remus entered the apartment about 10 minutes later.

'There were a lot of people.' Remus explained somehow a bd more nervous than really necessary.

'Doesn't matter, you're here now. Sirius was just about to report you missing though…' Anna told Remus, and they both couldn't help but laugh.

It was about another half hour later when Sirius announced it was gift time.

Anna had bought him a very old copy of his favorite Jane Austin book.

'I remembered you told me you liked it.' She explained as Remus thanked her, a big smile playing on his face.

Sirius who had hardly spoken a word since the Remus had started unwrapping his gifts stood up and handed him a little box. Remus just like any other 17 year old opened the box fast, and came eye to eye with a watch. It was a simple watch with simple black straps, a silver plate and golden highlighted numbers.

'I know it's not much, but I noticed you could use a new watch and seeing as you hate being late… If you don't like it we can always-'

'Don't like it?' Remus asked in surprise. 'Sirius I love it. It's absolutely perfect. It's absolutely amazing. It must have cost you a fortune.'

Remus didn't understand why Sirius would ever give him a gift like this. He wasn't that important after all…

'It wasn't that expensive.' Sirius stated, but they both knew he was lying.

* * *

When Anna was gone for about an hour, Sirius and Remus sat in the living room together still mauling over the lame excuse she had given the both of them. Everything what was left of the picnic sprayed across the floor around them? They were watching a movie quietly as time passed by. Remus couldn't help but feel happy… He hadn't known the feeling in so long that it took him quite a while to figure out that this was what he felt… Happiness.

'Thank you.' Remus whispered eventually, making Sirius turn his head.

'For what?' The older man asked the now 17 year old.

'Everything. I haven't really been able to celebrate my birthday for so long, and it's wonderful.' Remus answered an honest smile across his face. He hoped this moment would never end. That he could stay in this exact place for the rest of his life, until the moment he passed away.

'It's nothing really.' Sirius stated, smiling back to the boy.

'No it really is.' Remus continued. 'After my parents died I didn't really have anything to celebrate anymore, and my birthday was probably last on the list, and you try so hard to give me back all those things I missed. I'm really grateful for that.'

Sirius couldn't help but notice that this was the first time Remus talked about his past. He was this lost boy, but maybe he could find his way again. After all, with a bid help everyone can. Sirius however was happy that Remus trusted him enough to confide in him.

'You'll be ok, Remus.' Sirius said with a bright smile, and the teenager nodded.

A silence fell over them again, as they continued to watch the movie. Time seemed to pass incredibly fast as they were sitting there, laughing sometimes.

'I wonder what Anna's up to.' Sirius stated as he saw that it was already Sunday.

'Maybe she had a boyfriend.' Remus said with a shrug, but wished he hadn't as Sirius whitened within seconds.

'She wouldn't.' Sirius stated. Remus obviously had hit a nerve. He knew that Anna's ex-boyfriend wasn't the best guy in the world, but she still had the right to try again. She deserved happiness a much as the next person, maybe even more.

* * *

Remus had soon after gone to bed, and as Sirius did about an hour later he found Remus already in his bed. His eyes closed as he was sleeping, with a nice smile on his face for what seemed to be the first time ever.

As Sirius sat down on his bed at the other side he felt Remus move. The young man slowly opened his eyes.

'What's wrong?'

'Nothing Remus, it's just me.' Sirius stated smiling up at the boy.

'Oh, it's you…' Remus said in a comforting tone, his eyes still dazed from sleeping.

'It's me.' Sirius said again. He found that this was the best Remus has looked ever since they had met again in that police station about 3 months ago. He knew Remus felt safe, he wanted him to feel safe.

As Sirius climbed in bed next to the younger boy, Remus sad up a little bid. The boy smiled again as he saw Sirius' face, feeling so secure that he knew nothing could ever break this feeling. Yet before Remus knew what was really happening, or before he could figure out if it was him rather than Sirius who moved closer to the other, he felt soft lips being planted on his own. A small shock waved through his body. He knew it was wrong, he knew he should pull back, and that tomorrow would be another silent day. Yet in that moment, the moment his heart pounded in excitement, his breath got caught in his traught and his eyes fluttered shut, he didn't particularly care about any of it.

The kiss itself was so short one could even think that it hadn't taken place at all, but both of them knew it did as Sirius was the one to pull away still smiling softly at the boy, yet looking a bit apologetic.

'Happy seventeenth, Remus.' Sirius whispered.

'Goodnight.' Remus just sad as he lay down again, still feeling dazed although he wasn't sure it was from sleeping anymore…

* * *

I hopy you liked the chapter... I'll try to continue as soon as pssible... The next one, I believe is going to be a real tearjerker... Again, if I made many mistakes I offer you my apologies...

XoXo


	12. Chapter 12

_**Hi **_

_**I hope you are all doing ok... My vacation is almost over, and I have a ew more chapters I really want to post before I get to drawn in law books again. Thank you for all the reviews, just like always :p... **_

_**So this chap is something else... It has a few flashbacks just like a few chapters back, this one shows mostly Anna's past, actually most of this chapter is about Anna, and Anna's secret which is going to be revealed... I'm also going to do a chapter about Remus' past in a few chaps... I hope you will still enjoy this one though !! let me know, and tell me what you think... As soon as I get my reviews, as soon as I post Chapter 13 which I hope you'll like even more than this one... **_

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing (you guys know the drill)**_

_**XoXo**_

_**BB**_

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_The morning of her wedding Anna woke up next to a young man with black hair, and grayish eyes who seemed so familiar to her, yet was different in so many other ways... _

_She pressed herself up against the young man as they were lying in his bed. _

'_It has to be the last time.' She said softly towards the young man. 'I will never cheat on my husband.' _

'_Why will it be different?' The man asked her as he gently stroked her hair. _

'_It just has to be.' Anna lifted her head a bid so she could look into the man's eyes. 'Besides you are too young for me, and we should never have started this in the first place.' _

'_You'll never be happy.' The black haired man continued, and for the first time he reminded her of her best friend. _

'_Yes I will.' She sad up completely straight now. 'It will be different when we are married.'_

'_If you say so.' The young man came to sit up straight as well and pressed himself against Anna's back. He nibbled her earlobe gently as he pushed her long curly hair aside. 'If you say so.' _

* * *

Anna came out of a small café around 11am with a man, who looked a few years older than herself. He was wearing a black suit, with a neat tie.

'I had such a great time. Breakfast was amazing.' Anna said smiling brightly at the man. He had soft brown hair, and the most gorgeous green eyes.

'Anytime…' The man stated. He too seemed to be in quite a good mood. 'But I really have to go now, I'm already far too late for work.'

'Yes, I know…' the young woman said, being happy that she at least didn't have school today. 'I'll see you tomorrow…'

'Can I pick you up?' He asked her in a suddenly serious tone, and suddenly Anna looked a bid uncomfortable.

'I don't think is such a good idea.' Anna said tugging her hair back after her ear. 'Maybe later.'

'That's what you always say.' The man continued, now seemingly a bid annoyed. 'It's like you're ashamed of me.'

'It's not like that at all.' Anna said in a mixture of serenity and despair. 'I just can't explain it right now.'

'I guess I can wait a little longer…' The man said reluctantly.

'Thank you so much for understanding Thomas.' Anna said smiling again, feeling relieved. He couldn't come to her home; it would only get her in trouble. She knew Sirius would be mad, that he'd be too worried, and that he'd never trust Thomas.

'I don't really have a choice do I?' Thomas stated. 'Can't loose you, now can I?'

'That's kind of up to you…' Anna felt really happy as she looked Thomas in the eye. He was an amazing person, and maybe in time she'd be able to bring him home, and make the best of it. The young man laughed, as he pulled her into a hug.

'I'll see you tomorrow than at my house.' He placed a gentle kiss on her cheek just like he did every time. 'Bye.' He let go of her, and was preparing to leave, when Anna had a 'now or never' feeling.

'Thomas wait!' The young man turned around, and Anna took the few steps they had already been separated towards him, and before she herself knew what was happening she placed her lips firmly on his, kissing him hard, yet sweet. Thomas who seemed stunned at first didn't pull back, and Anna was happy to find that after a few seconds he was actually kissing her back. Their kiss stayed gentle, neither of them trying to deepen it… Soon however they both felt the need to breath, and broke loose from the contact breathing heavily. 'I'll see you tomorrow.' Anna said smiling even brighter than before, as she turned around and started going towards the parking space a few streets back.

Anna however didn't see the young man at the other side of the street looking at her with a whitened face and wide shocked eyes.

'Sirius are you ok?' Remus asked as he came out of the grocery shop as well.

'I'm fine.' Sirius said firmly, but everything his voice made it sound like he wasn't. 'We need to get home, now!'

* * *

'_Darling I'm so proud of you.' A woman with bright blond hair said smiling down at her daughter as she caught a glace of the young girl in her white wedding dress. 'You are finally going to lead the life you are supposed to. I'm so happy for you.' _

'_I know mother.' Anna said giving a sad smile her mother didn't recognize. She hadn't seen Evan for days, and she had to ask him something, she had to do it before the wedding too. 'Will dad still give me away?'_

'_Of course he will, my child.' Her mother stated. Lily, Patty, and Alice were standing in the corner of the room just talking. They looked so good as bridesmaids, Anna just could not help but wonder if one would be willing to trade places with her. 'Naturally he will do so reluctantly.'_

'_Mother would you care to take Patty, Lily and Alice and get me Sirius I need to tell him something. It's important.' Anna said, and her mother looked up in confusion. She never really liked her daughter hanging with that person, ever since he left his very wealthy family. _

'_As you wish, darling.' Her mother stated formally, it was the closest to her normal tone than any other word she had said so far. 'Come on girls. Give the bride some time alone.'_

_Only moments later Sirius entered the room, and before he could even properly close the door behind him Anna flew around his neck._

'_I love you. You know that right?' She said desperately trying to hug him even thither in her desperate movement. 'You'll always be my best friend. Always.' _

'_Anna, is everything alright?' Sirius said in a concerned tone, a tone he only had gotten after what had happened to himself now almost a year ago._

'_I'm fine. No I'm not. I did something really really awful, and I don't know what to do.' Anna stated as she was rambling pointlessly. 'But remember, no matter what you hear, I'll always love you.'_

'_I'll always love you too.' Sirius had no idea what was going on, but frankly was quite concerned about his friend. She had not been in such a state a lot, especially on a 'happy' day like this. Anna finally let go of him, and pulled back a little. Sirius looked at her and smiled. 'You look amazing. If I was straight, we'd elope.'_

_Anna grinned, and for the first time that day she felt some relief. Yet it was weird… She could tell all her friends without any hesitation that she loved them, and yet she never once really told Evan. She never actually, in all those years they had been together told him those 3 words: I love you. Yet she told all her friends, and family: her mother and father, Sirius, Lily James, Peter and Alice, and she even thought she already had told Patty. Why was it then that she couldn't tell her soon to be husband? The man she was going to spend the rest of her life with? The man she loved above no other, right? Right? _

* * *

Anna came in not long after Sirius and Remus had. To Remus she seemed more happy then she had in all the months they had known each other right now. He suspected that that didn't matter to Sirius though, who looked as if he was ready to commit murder.

'Hi…' Anna stated in a friendly tone, not knowing what was going on with her best friend. 'I thought you wanted to make the best out of Remus' day off from school?'

'That was the plan.' Sirius said matter-of-factly, a cold tone in his normal so sweet voice. 'But something got in the way…'

'Oh?' Anna looked genuinely confused, Remus thought she probably was. 'Did something happen?'

'You can say it like that I guess…' Sirius stood up from were he was seated, and walked over to his roommate. 'I suddenly felt sick to my stomach…'

'How come?' Anna asked, now she even sounded confused. The poor girl had no idea what was coming to her, but than it hid her right between the eyes…

'Well you know… I found out that my oldest friend had been lying to me when her tongue was down someone else's throat!' Sirius suddenly stated, well yelled was more accurate.

'What are you-'

'Don't!' Sirius interrupted Anna. 'You know very well what I'm talking about. Study group, my arse. I can't believe you're dating again, without my concern, without even telling me about it!'

'You want to know why I didn't tell you about it?' Anna asked remorseful, yet determent. 'Because I knew how you'd react and I wanted to avoid this, until I was certain it was what I wanted.'

'What you wanted?' Sirius continued raging at the young woman as Remus watched the two of them. He had never really seen Sirius angry. Ok there had been the time Sirius had send him to his room, but that was more out of confusion and fear than anger. But this, according to Remus Sirius really didn't have the right to act like this. He had no right telling Anna what she could or could not do. 'Do you even remember how you acted when you were with Evan? When he had you convinced that he was what you wanted? That he gave you the life you wanted?'

'It's nothing like that…' Anna tried, but Sirius didn't have ears for it and just continued his sermon about how she was doing the same thing again, that she was falling for the same tricks again…

'Stop it! Just stop it!' Anna suddenly yelled, tears filling up her eyes. This was something Remus suddenly had never seen before. Anna who was normally the one who was mad fast seemed like a little and hurt girl… She was broken up. 'Thomas isn't like that! And even if he is, that's for me to find out. You shouldn't judge people who you don't know.'

'Right… Like you didn't judge Chris when you could!' Sirius didn't seem to notice her tears, which were now dripping down from her cheeks.

'And with good reason!' Anna said quietly. She had known Sirius loved him, and she had never trusted him. Just like Evan, Chris had become a very painful bruise on their relationship… But they hardly ever talked about their past, it didn't seem to matter anymore. Up until now that is.

'You just wanted to be right from the beginning!' Sirius deep down knew he was out of line, but he couldn't find himself to care anymore.

'No I didn't! You know very well I didn't.' Anna said her voice trembling almost as much as her body. Remus felt so much remorse for her. She was scared just like he had been so many times, but he didn't dare do anything. As Anna looked Sirius in the eye she spoke one last sentence which made Sirius quiet down almost immediately. 'Your fear isn't mine…'

With that Anna turned around towards the door and started walking away. A few moments later she left the apartment again, and with that left the two boys alone again…

* * *

'_Why didn't you ask Sirius to be your best man?' Anna asked Evan only a few minutes before he had to go and wait by the altar. _

'_Honey, you know it's bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding.' Evan said calmly. 'You should go and wait.'_

'_Answer me.' Anna stated towards her fiancé. 'I need to know. I asked you to ask Sirius to be your best man. Why didn't you?' She asked him again. She needed an answer now; it couldn't wait until tomorrow, or even tonight. She had to have the answer now._

'_He's sick.' Evan stated in a formal tone, as if he was discussing the weather with a stranger._

'_No he isn't.' Anna said not understanding where Evan was at. Sirius was in the church with them. She had seen him, he looked perfectly fine like always. _

'_Yes he is. I don't want my best man to be a sick person like he is.' Evan spat out the words, and suddenly Anna knew. She knew what her fiancé meant. Suddenly she knew what Sirius had said just a few days ago, and suddenly she knew how Snape had found about Sirius that day. Before she could say anything however, Evan continued. 'And starting tomorrow he won't be able to put ideas in your head anymore.'_

'_He doesn't put ideas in my head.' Anna said feeling more angry than confused right now. 'And he's not a sick person. It's the most normal thing in the world. Feelings don't have a gender.' _

_Evan turned towards her for the first time since he had seen her entered the room, and came towards her with big steps._

'_Honey, you know he puts ideas in your head. You would never agree to his perverted ways if he hadn't.' Evan's voice seemed to be concerned, and although Anna knew he probably was, for the first time she also knew he didn't have a reason. 'You know I only want the best for you right?'_

_Anna nodded. She knew he did. He loved her, she knew that was true. It had to be. _

'_Now, go and wait for your turn.' Evan said towards the young woman. 'You look beautiful.'_

'_Thank you…' Anna said, not knowing how this conversation had come to an ending already. She turned around at once, and started walking out of the room, yet as she was about to leave, she turned around again. 'Why did you tell Snape?' _

'_I had to. Sirius needed to know that being evil will always be punished. He chose to lead his life unpure, which is not my problem.' Evan said it as if it was the most normal thing in the world, but it wasn't. Not to Anna, not to most people she knew. Not to the people she loved truly. She left the room in quite a hurry, feeling tears burning in her eyes. _

_She didn't however get a chance to start crying, as she already heard her tune. She needed to walk down the Aisle. She had to say 'I do'. It had to be done. _

* * *

'_**Thank you for being such a friend to me. Oh I pray a friend for life, and have I ever told you how much you mean to me? Oh you mean so much to me'**_ A song started playing on the radio, which was on far too loud. Anna's thoughts were rushed as she was speeding on her road to nowhere.

How could Sirius say such things? Wasn't he supposed to be her best friend? Wasn't he supposed to love and trust her unconditionally? Wasn't he supposed to want to see her happy?

Anna wasn't even sure if Sirius even thought she deserved happiness. He didn't trust her instincts, and he wondered why she hadn't told him yet? He was practically a psychopath if he thought about Anna dating again. Yet she had the right to, didn't she?

'_**Please don't go just yet! Can you stay a moment please? We can dance forever under your stars tonight. We'll live and breathe this dream.' **_

She deserved to be happy as much as the next person. If Sirius, himself, started dating again she would be OK with that as well. He deserved a friend, a lover… He deserved love. Yet so did she.

In fact, it wasn't even that she loved Thomas, she didn't know him will enough to ever be curtain it was love. However, maybe she did love him, after al she had never before really loved in that way.

Why didn't Sirius see that? Why didn't he want to help her?

He should.

Anna felt like her blood was boiling as she drove on a small road far to fast. Everything around her was dark. She had no idea where she was going, no idea where she'd end up. The only thing she did know is that she had to get away.

'_**So close your eyes, but don't dream too deep and please pass me some memories and when I fall you're underneath a thousand broken hearts, carried by a thousand broken wings…'**_ The song continued, yet Anna could barely hear it. It seemed to be on the background, even though it was filling the whole car.

She wanted to scream.

She needed to scream.

Suddenly however she found her car slipping from the road, trying to turn the car around… What was happening?

The last thing she thought about was that she had to make things right with Sirius…

Than everything went black…

* * *

'_Dearly beloved.' The priest started in a formal tone, as Anna's father had just dropped his daughter at the alter. 'We are gathered here today to celebrate a magnificent event. Two young people will give their lives to each other from this day forward until the moment of death.' Anna swallowed deeply looking at everyone and everything that wasn't Evan. Until death, that was an awfully long time. The priest continued to chit chat until he finally came down to business, and Anna felt as if she was going to be sick at any moment now. _

'_Evan Christoff Peter Blaikon do you take Miss Annabella Kathrin Madison Lauren to be our lawfully wedded wife in sickness and in health for richer and for poorer until death does you apart?'_

_Evan took a deep breath while already nodding._

'_I do.' He spoke with a smile. He knew she was his' and no one else could take her away anymore. From this day he'd own her._

'_Miss Annabella Kathrin Madison Lauren do you take Evan Christoff Peter Blaikon to be your lawfully wedded husband in sickness and in health for richer and for poorer until death does you apart?' The priest, and everyone else in the small but crowded church looked at her, and Anna didn't know what to do. Was she really going to be 'Annabella' for the rest of her life? She looked at her friends: her tree bridesmaids, Sirius, James and Peter who were all smiling brightly at her, and in the back of the church in a dark corner she saw Regulus smiling his smug smile just like always. She didn't love him at all, it was nothing like that. She got together with him about two weeks after Evan's marriage proposal. Regulus was freedom, Evan was prison, and as she looked at him for the first time it hit her that she didn't want to be imprisoned…_

'_I don't.' _

'_Than I pronounce-'the priest started but realized what Anna had said. 'What?'_

'_I don't. And I never will.' She said more loudly than the first time, and everyone looked at her in surprise. 'I'm sorry, I can't do this.' She said it towards Evan who looked completely taken aback, and with those words she ran away from him. Lily on her heels…_

* * *

It had been hours since Anna had left the apartment, and although Remus could see Sirius was still angry with her, he was also very concerned. She didn't pick up her phone, she didn't answer any of their calls, and she wasn't with any of her friends… Well, Remus had said that she might have been with this person called Thomas, but that only made Sirius' mood worse.

Remus knew Sirius was just trying to protect his friend, but he wasn't sure if this was the right way to do so. A few hours ago a very enraged Anna took her car and left, and that alone was reason to panic. Although she would never admit it herself, Anna had an anger management problem… As Remus looked over to Sirius he wondered where she got it…

Suddenly the phone rang, and both Sirius and Remus almost sprang towards it.

'Sirius Black.' Sirius stated as he picked up the phone. You could see that he wanted it to be his friend…

'Mister Black, this is Eva Milton speaking. I'm calling from the memorial hospital.' The woman said in a serious tone at the other sight of the line.

'What can I help you with?' Sirius asked in wonderment, suddenly getting an even worse feeling.

'Tonight a young woman was brought into the emergence room. We couldn't identify her yet, but she had this number on her speed dial. Could you come over as soon as possible, or can you give a lead how to find out her family?' The woman spoke, as Sirius felt like he was going to faint.

'Is she alight?' Sirius asked his voice trembling. Remus looked up, wondering what was wrong, or if something had happened. 'She not…' Sirius couldn't say it, he couldn't even think it.

'She's in a coma.' The woman spoke again in a serious tone. 'Can you tell her who she is?'

'Anna… Anna Lauren.' Sirius spoke his eyes more fearful then he could ever remember. 'I'll be over as soon as possible. Do you need anything?'

'Her insurance papers and identification if that is possible.' Eva explained. The woman sounded reluctant.

'Will she be alright?' Sirius asked now, he felt empty and scared. What would he do without her?

'I don't know the doctor is still examining her.' Eva told Sirius over the phone. 'Maybe we'll know more when you are here.'

'I'll be right over.' Sirius said, hanging up the phone without saying anything else. He was shocked to say the least. He had to get to the hospital now. Why did they fight? Why did he let her go?

Suddenly Sirius got sight of Remus again. 'Take your coat, we're leaving.'

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I hope you enjoyed reading it... plzzz let me know !! Read and review people: the two most important R's in life (together with Rest ofcourse)


	13. Chapter 13

_**Hello everyone !!**_

_**Let me start off by saying: thank you for the amazing sweet reviews and such.. As promised I posted this chapter before I had to go back to school (which I'll be doing on monday).. Oh Btw if I forgot to reply to any of you, you can tell me in your next review, and I'll try to make it up.. :D **_

_**So about the chapter : Well there's not much to say, except it's the first sex scene in the fic, and the first one I've ever really finished writing (so pleas don't be too harch, I did my best -- yet you can always give tips!! -----!!!**__**OH and BTW if you concider yourself not ready for this kind of scene you can just read the first part of the chapter... Yet I know that even if you concider yourself too young you'd read it anyway (that's what I would have done)!!!-----**_

_**I'll try to post the next chapter as soon as possible which I think will be within 2 weeks... **_

_**Disclaimer: I still own nothing but the plot... **_

_**XoXo**_

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_Beep… Beep… Beep… 4 hours 34 minutes and 20 seconds… Beep… Beep… Beep… 4 hours 34 minutes and 23 seconds… Beep… Beep… Beep… 4 hours 34 minutes and 26 seconds… Beep… Beep… Beep… _

Sirius had been sitting next to the lifeless body of his best friend for 4 hours 34 minutes and 29 seconds… He couldn't believe this had happened. How could he have let her leave like that? It was his entire fault! What if Anna didn't pull through? What if she died? She couldn't leave him, not like this, not right now.

'Sirius?' He heard the familiar and concerned voice of Lily from behind. He hadn't even heard her and James entering the white and sterile hospital room. 'Remus called, he told us what happened. I'm sorry we couldn't come sooner.'

'Is she going to be alright?' James asked as he grabbed his best friends' shoulder as if to comfort the other man.

'I don't know.' Sirius answered at the top of his voice, yet it came out as just a whisper. He could hardly remember ever having been this scared in his entire life. Why couldn't it have been him in the hospital bed instead of her? 'She has to pull out of the coma herself, but there's a possibility that she won't.'

'She's strong.' Lily said, hoping with all her heart that Anna would make it. 'She'll fight.'

A long silence fell over the trio as they all sad down beside the bed. The only noise that came from the room was the beeping of the machinery.

'Where is Remus anyway?' James asked eventually, feeling very uncomfortable and wanting to break this terrible quiet.

'Remus?' Sirius suddenly looked up, he seemed terrified. 'He went for a walk a while ago. He should have been back by now.'

'I'll go look for him' Lily said quickly as she saw the panic building in her friends' eyes. Lily left the room in a hurry, looking at her husband as if to tell him to comfort Sirius.

Lily found Remus about ten minutes later in a small hallway. He was sitting on a bench staring at the grey painted wall. Although Remus was practically an adult he seemed like a small and innocent child in that moment. He looked scared and alone.

'I hate hospitals too, you know.' She said in a friendly voice. Remus looked up at her and gave her a small smile. 'You can come stay with me and James for a few days if you'd like.'

Remus looked suddenly even more terrified and even confused. It reminded her of how Sirius had looked mere minutes ago when he had realized Remus hadn't been back yet.

'Does Sirius want me to leave? Does he want me to go with you?' The boy was obviously scared, but Lily couldn't figure if it was because he was in this hospital, or because one of the people closest to him was fighting for their life, or because he thought Sirius wanted him to go away even if it was just for a few days, or a mixture of all of the above.

'No, I don't think so.' Lily said still smiling at the young man next to her. Remus really was a special person.

'Then I don't want to go away. I want to stay with Sirius.' Remus said his voice suddenly more firm and secure. Lily had half expected this answer. Remus however soon continued, slightly surprising Lily with how open he suddenly was. 'It's not easy being alone when you're afraid. He shouldn't be alone; no one should for that matter, when he's terrified of loosing someone so dear to him. '

'As you wish, Remus.' Lily answered, too tired to even argue with the teenager. 'I think you and Sirius should go home and rest though. At least for a couple of hours. Both of you look terrible and tired.'

Remus nodded, he really felt terrible and he really was tired, but somehow he knew he couldn't sleep. He was a lot of everything that wasn't good. He was too tired, too scared, too pained, and too lost.

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After a long talk they convinced Sirius to go home for a while. James and Lily had to promise they would stay there and keep watch. James dropped them of at home, but soon left to go back to his wife who was still waiting besides Anna's bed.

As soon as James left Sirius lost all control over his body and his emotions. Remus has never seen Sirius cry before, had never really seen the other man in fear either. He seemed so venerable right now, and although it never was like this normally Remus found himself walking over to Sirius and wrapping his arms tightly around the taller man. Remus told Sirius it was going to be alright, that everything would work out, and that everything would be back to normal in no time at all.

Sirius wanted so bad to believe Remus that he found himself drinking in the boy's embrace, almost drowning in his scent, and his gentile touch.

'She is going to be alright.' Remus repeated. He more than anyone knew what it was like to lose a person so close to you. Remus felt Sirius nod against his shoulder and pulled back slightly as honey eyes met the watery grey once which belonged to the person who had saved him…

Remus knew he had done a lot of inappropriate things as of late, but what he did now was by far the worst. He closed the already small distance between them and crushed their lips together. It took him some time to realize that Sirius had somehow met him half way, and was actually kissing him back. Their tongues battling in some kind of desperate move, while tears were still dropping from Sirius' eyes as he pushed and pulled at Remus' shirt. The younger man pulled back just long enough to allow Sirius to take it off completely.

He knew he shouldn't let this happen, but Sirius needed him, and for all that mattered he needed Sirius too, maybe even more than he was willing to admit.

However the moment Sirius felt trembling fingers pull at the buttons of his shirt, and found himself about to bite down in Remus' soft skin he awoke from his trance.

'No, we can't!' Sirius said pushing Remus away slightly. 'It's wrong. We can't, I can't.'

'But I want to.' Remus tried to come closer to Sirius once again. 'I really, really want to.'

'I can't' Sirius repeated, as he tried to look at everything that wasn't Remus. The younger man took his hand in his own guiding it down to his lower back.

'Is it because of what I said before? Because it's different now.' Remus placed soft kisses in the nape of Sirius neck. 'Is it because you don't want to go there with someone so young, because it's wrong and we shouldn't?' Remus' tone was something completely different then the usual steady tone. All the emotions combined in what he was trying to make Sirius understand. He wanted to help Sirius forget what had happened tonight, wanted to help him let go… He wanted himself to be able to let go as well…

Sirius lost himself in the moment again as he felt Remus hot breath tickle his skin. He took the other boys lips again, kissing him fiercely, holding on to the teenager as if his life depended on it.

He didn't stop Remus this time as he started to work the bottoms of his shirt again. Sirius however knew it was wrong to go through with this thing, whatever this was supposed to be, but he wanted to feel something other than complete disaster. The voice in the back of his mind got completely shut down, as Sirius couldn't find himself to care anymore when Remus moaned softly into their kiss.

Neither would later remember how they stumbled their way into Sirius' bedroom, while Sirius was slowly working his way down from Remus' jaw to his shoulder playfully biting it as he opened the younger mans pants.

Remus groaned unashamed at Sirius touch as he too, started opened the other mans pants. He was somehow very willing to get a move on this, this wasn't even supposed to be gentle, no anymore, or maybe it had never really been.

Sirius found himself pushing Remus on the bed just moments later, the boy only wearing his boxers now. The older man practically climbed atop of Remus to continue their kiss.

As Remus already swollen lips started sucking the nape of Sirius' neck again, Sirius couldn't resist any longer and rubbed their groins together, both of them moaning loudly at the friction. Remus bucked his hips up involuntary not wanting to lose their contact.

'I want you to do it now.' Remus said his voice hoarse. 'I want you to fuck me now.'

Sirius nodded, too far gone to even consider not complying. Sirius moved down taking the waistband of Remus' boxers and threw them somewhere across the room, his own followed soon after.

As he came back up a little he took a small bottle of lube from his nightstand. He spread it across his fingers quickly, as he placed them at Remus entrance.

He looked up at Remus and caught the boys' eyes. He silently asked if he was really sure about this. Remus answered the question by moving his hips upwards even more to give Sirius better access.

When the older man's finger finally entered Remus, he couldn't help but hiss in pain. This motion made Sirius still immediately; ready to pull back again as for a minute the voice in his grew louder again. Remus however soon relaxed around him, and moved into Sirius touch deeper.

'Go on.' He spoke again, his voice so unnatural for the young man. 'I want to feel you. I need to.'

Every word that fell from Remus' lips made his already painfully hard cock twitch in anticipation. As Sirius soon added a second finger and even a third Remus watched him carefully, moaning half in pain, half in pleasure.

The moment Sirius hid that bundle of nerves Remus hissed again, this time though it was definitely not in pain.

'Oh god… Do that again.' Remus said panting and moaning beneath him. Sirius obliges, repeating the motion from mere seconds ago. He loved all the little noises Remus made, and almost came when the boy bid his lips to muffle away a particularly loud moan. He looked so incredibly gorgeous as he lay there, his hair messed up, his lips swollen, his hands moving across the sheets as if he wanted to grab something.

Remus whimpered disappointed at the loss of Sirius' fingers. Inside of him as the older man pulled them out. Sirius however, was soon ready to replace his fingers with his cock.

As Sirius first entered him careful and slow Remus closed his eyes tightly, taking the bed sheets into his fist. However no matter how much it pained him he kept telling Sirius to go on.

'So tight.' Was all Sirius could bring out as he sank deeper and deeper into the teenager.

When Sirius was almost fully inside of Remus he pulled back, and pushed back in slowly, while Remus was telling him, encouraging him, to go on as his cries of pain became moans of pleasure again as he grew accustomed to the feeling of Sirius' cock inside of him. They had soon found a pace that fitted the both of them.

Every time Sirius pushed back into Remus it was a moment off pure bliss. It seemed perfect, felt perfect. His cock tight around the smaller mans ass.

'Go faster.' Remus groaned as he moved his hand to stroke his own member, but Sirius batted his hand away, resting his own wait now only on his other hand. He started jerking off Reus n the same way he was fucking him.

'Oh yes, so good.' Remus shut his eyes close again as he soon felt his orgasm built inside of him.

Sirius couldn't even utter one syllable anymore as he was doing his very best not to come from Remus' cries alone. He was practically slamming into Remus as they moved against each other perfectly.

When he hit that spot again it almost made Remus scream, but as soon as Sirius felt that he himself wouldn't last long anymore he started jerking off Remus faster. The room filled with only their moaning and panting.

'Siri, I'm going to-' Remus tried as Sirius kept slamming into his body fast and hard. Remus cried out Sirius' name as he came all over the other man's hand and his own stomach.

Hearing his name falling from the younger mans lips like that took Sirius over the hedge and he came seconds later deep inside of Remus.

Sirius didn't know how or when he found the strength to pull out of Remus and fall on the bed next to him.

'That was…' He tried to bring out still panting harshly, but no matter what he couldn't find the right words anyway.

'Yes, I know.' Remus answered, pulling Sirius into another kiss, this one sloppy and short lived because of their lack of oxygen.

As Remus crawled inside Sirius' embrace and was about to slumber of into sleep he heard his roommate say one more thing.

'It's going to be fun at the next homeowners meeting. We probably woke up the entire apartment.' Soon after those words both of them drifted off to a peaceful sleep, forgetting all about the horrible day it had been, and the difficulties they would face the next few once…

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**_So this was it... I hope you all at least liked it a bid... I know the scene was kind of rushed, or at least I think it was but that's also kind of the point..._**

**_Read and Review plzzz... _**

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	14. Chapter 14

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Hi everyone !!

_**Hope you are all doing OK... I know it took longer again to post this chapter, but school is taking up all my time, it's been harder than last year... I want to thank all of you who posted your reviews and comments. And a very special thanks to Mokubahv, who agreed to beta for me. She's a great person, and actually got me as far as to finish this chapter. **_

_**I hope you'll like it, because nthing much happens, and it's pretty boring. But it had to be written so suffer through it !!**_

_**XoXo**_

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_**Diclaimer: as you all know I own everything... I mean nothing !!** _

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Remus woke up the next morning feeling more rested than he had in years. Looking at the clock on the night stand he saw that it was already half past 10. He could hardly remember when he had slept this long and this peaceful. He could hear the water running from the bathroom and assumed Sirius was showering. Remus couldn't help but nuzzle back into his pillow; he wanted to keep this feeling of safety for as long as he could. He also knew that the moment he got out of bed it would all be over.

Sirius, who had been out and abut for half an hour felt completely different. He already had had his reality check the moment he had opened h eyes and realized what he had done. He felt even more broken than the night before. Not only was his best friend dyeing, and was that partly his fault, he had now assaulted, and raped an innocent minor who trusted him.

When Sirius had gotten out of bed he had instantly called James asking how Anna was doing, but there hadn't been any change. James had said that he'd pick them up around 11, but Sirius more than dreaded the moment he had to wake up Remus and had been postponing it for as long as he could. Sirius knew he should have been in school anyway, but he himself had called work to tell them he'd work at home today. Even if that had been a small lie Sirius couldn't have cared less.

As he came out of the shower only moments later he already missed the hot water running down his body. He knew that he had no choice but to wake Remus after he was finished getting dressed.

He walked back into the bedroom finding Remus headfirst on the pillow next to his own. The sheets were covering far too little of Remus' wonderful fragile body, and too soft to ever touch skin. Sirius tried as hard as he could to get the images of last night out of his head, but nothing seemed to work. Maybe he really was just that perverted.

He wondered who he should call to take Remus away from him, to a safer place… Normally he was the one answering those phone calls and not the other way round.

'Remus?' Sirius said from a distance, grabbing the clothes from last night off the floor. 'Remus, you have to wake up. James is going to be here soon…'

Remus stirred a little, and eventually turned around when Sirius called his name for a third time.

'We're leaving in less than half an hour.' Sirius told the teenager as his sleepy eyes met slightly disturbed and freaked out once. As he was about to leave the room again, not willing to be alone with the younger man he told Remus something else. 'I'll call the office tomorrow so they can assign your case to someone else.'

Remus said up at Sirius' words, immediately wide awake. He was so confused. Why would Sirius want to do that?

'What? Why?' Remus didn't want someone else.

'Remus.' Sirius swallowed loudly, before he continued. 'I'm sorry for what I did to you last night. That should never have happened. I was out of line, and I hope you'll be able to forgive me one day… You can go stay with Lily and James until you have found another place to stay, they won't mind.'

'What are you going on about?' Remus still felt confused, and Sirius ramblings weren't helping in the slightest. 'You didn't do anything wrong.'

'I molested you! 'Tears filling up his eyes, the tears from the guilt he felt. 'And I'm afraid I'll do it again.'

'Remus got out of bed, quickly doing on some of the clothes Sirius had thrown him earlier. He could hardly believe that he was the one who was so calm and collected about this.

'Sirius, I was there too. I could have said no, and bedsides I was kind of the one who seduced you, not the other way around.' Remus said while walking towards the older man.

'But I'm the adult. I should have known better. Remus, I need to protect you. I shouldn't ever do what I did.' Sirius flipped his hands while talking as a sort of visual reminder.

'Don't be so hard on yourself. You can molest me anytime.' Remus tried to lighten the mood in a playful tone, But Sirius wasn't up for that at all. 'If it really bothers you that much we'll act like it never happened. No one had to know, just don't send me away. I don't want to leave.

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After a few more minutes Sirius agreed to act like nothing happened, and told Remus to get ready. Everything was still a little uncomfortable when James entered the apartment, but they just shrugged it of and said they were still pretty messed up. Which wasn't even a lie. Sirius still felt terrible about his roommate. He wanted her to be alright. He needed her to be alright…

Just as they were about to leave Remus' cell phone rang.

'Go on… It will only be a minute.' He told Sirius and James who looked at him as he took his phone out his pocked. 'I'll be right there.'

The two older men left the room, and while Remus heard them talking in the hallway he answered his phone. He expected it to be Paul, but got pleasantly surprised.

'Hello, this is Remus.' The teenager spoke through the phone.

'Hi Remmie, its Micah.' The voice on the other side of the line said. 'How are you?'

'Ok, I guess…' Remus answered kind of overwhelmed. He hadn't expected to actually hear anything from Micah. 'You?'

'I'm great!' He sounded happy, and somehow a little smug. 'So have you been thinking about my proposal?'

'Yes, but I can't do it this week. So do you mind postponing?' Truth be told Remus hadn't really thought about Micah, and didn't even really know if he wanted to go out with him. Let alone go out with him n a date.

'You're not trying to get rid of me are you?' Micah asked in a playful voice which made Remus smile just a bit.

'No, no, I'm not. It's just, the woman I'm living with got in a car crash yesterday, and she isn't doing really well. She's in a coma. I really can't go out right now.' Remus explained. He felt relieved that he didn't have to go out with him, really relieved. He liked Micah, but was that even close to what Remus wanted?

'Say no more Rem. I understand, and I'll wait. She's going to be ok though, right?'

'We don't know yet. We're going to see her doctor today.'

'I really hope that she going to be fine.' Micah said sounding sincere. 'You should try and get enough rest though…'

Micah seemed genuinely concerned and Remus could not help but smile as he thought the other teenager actually cared about him.

'Shouldn't you be in class anyway?' Remus asked as he noticed the time, and realized that Micah had school.

'Well yeah, but I didn't see you today, and I thought something might have happened… So I told the teacher I had to go to the bathroom. I just couldn't wait any longer. I needed to make sure you were alright. I needed to hear your voice.'

Remus was glad they were talking on the phone because he felt his cheeks burning up. They hardly even knew each other.

'I'm glad you called.' Remus said after a few seconds of silence.

'Any time, Remmie! Micah spoke, his tone gentile like that of a friend. This was the moment he hears Sirius call out his name from the hallway.

'I've got to go.' Remus spoke suddenly more urgent. 'Call me?'

'Of course.' Micah said obviously smirking on the other end of the line. 'Take care, Rem.'

'You too, Micah.' With those last words Remus hung up and walked towards where Sirius and James were waiting.

'What took you so long?' Sirius asked a bit tipped o and nervous.

'I had a phone call. A friend from school wondered where I was.' Remus explained without getting into any further details.

'OK.' Sirius said seemingly content with Remus' answer. 'Let's get going than.'

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'Why can't I see her?' A young man with wavy brown hair spoke angrily at a nurse in Memorial Hospital.

'Only the immediate family can.' The nurse spoke.

'She doesn't even talk to her family anymore!' The young man continued, a hint of desperation found in his voice.

'Be that as it may, she is legally living with Mister Black, and he is allowed in, as are the people who he pointed out as her family.' The nurse continued. 'If you want to know more about her condition you will have to speak tom him.'

The man, who looked very reserved, seemed to be on the edge of tears.

'But I don't know him.' He said. 'I've never had the chance to meet him. Pleas, I'm just worried about her.' The man's voice was now trembling. 'It's a wonder I even found out that she's in the hospital.'

'I'm sorry.' The nurse spoke genuinely sorry that she couldn't let him enter. 'I really am.'

The young man was about to give up when two men of Anna's age and a teenager entered the hallway in a quick pace.

'I can't help you.' The nurse said again. 'But maybe he can.' She gave a nod towards the young man with black hair, pale skin and dark grey eyes. 'That's minster Black tight there.'

'Thank you so much!' The nurse could see how grateful he was just by the look in his deep brown eyes. She had to admit, it was one hell of a messed up family.

The young man ran up to the threesome who was still walking towards somewhere.

'Excuse me.' The man spoke, and as if on queue the three turned around and came to look at him.

'You!' Sirius said. He immediately recognized the man in front of him. The brown hair, the height, the suit… It was Thomas; there was no doubt about it. 'What gives you the right to be here?'

'I'm really sorry to bother you. I know you must be having a hard time-'

'A hard time?' Sirius voice was harsh and violent, and James looked at his best friend in confused about the same time realization dawned upon Remus. Sirius who was about to continue his uncontrolled rage towards Anna's unprepared boyfriend was surprised when he suddenly felt a hand grip at his arm.

'Don't.' Remus spoke, whispered was more like it. 'Now is not the right time. He is here for a reason. He means well.'

'but-' Sirius seemed like a small child, and even James had to wonder who the adult was, because now it seemed more that Remus was the responsible one looking over Sirius.

'Talk to him. Explain what happened. You can fight your battle when Anna is better.' Remus continued not waiting what Sirius had to bring to the table. 'Promise me. Think about what she would want.'

Sirius nodded. Remus' words seemed to have calmed him within seconds. A skill James hadn't even mastered after years and years of practice. James would later realize that it was at that moment he should have known his best friend was getting himself into deep trouble, maybe he even should have found out long before this specific moment.

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The days past by in a blur. Sirius didn't know why, but it intrigued him that Thomas seemed to camp next to Anna's bed just like he and Remus did. The moon between Remus and himself had worsened over the last few days due to far too less sleep, and the tension that seemed to always be there between them. They hardly even talked anymore, just kind of existed next to each other. They were becoming to strangers in the same house, the same room, the same everything.

Today they had been sitting in Anna's room for hours again. Sirius only got out grabbing water or a cop of coffee now and than, or when someone pushed him to get at least something to eat.

'So' Sirius spoke after a very long silence when he realized he couldn't keep ignoring Thomas forever, 'How did you two meet?'

Thomas looked up when he realized Sirius was talking to him. Sirius didn't talk to him, Sirius barely talked to the teenager who was always with him.

'She applied for an internship at my father's law firm about two months ago.' Thomas explained only half surprised that Anna hadn't talked about him at all…

'Did she get it?' Sirius asked in a mock voice. He knew Anna really wasn't the type to sleep around to get a job, but still you never knew. She had done it once before already, sleeping around.

'She pulled back her application because she got the internship she initially wanted.' Thomas explained.

'And where do you fit in to this whole story?' Sirius continued his questionnaire.

'I'm junior lawyer at my father's firm. I met her when she came in for an interview.' The young man seemed to be very calm and collected as if he had expected Sirius to ask all those questions. 'We started talking, and hit off right away. You must know what that is like.'

Sirius looked at Remus for the first time in hours. He did know what that felt like, but that didn't mean that he should…

'And you like her?' Sirius asked now, his voice softening a bit as he was reminded of the fact that whatever it was Anna and Thomas were doing was far less worse than what he had done with Remus just days ago.

Thomas just nodded as he looked down at Anna. She was so beautiful and peaceful. She just seemed to be asleep. 'I do really like her.'

Sirius later saw this as the moment he realized that Thomas wasn't his worst enemy and that the guy was pretty much OK.

Moments later the conversation was already far more civil, and Sirius could actually see him and Thomas hanging out together…

XXX

'Mister Black?' A man came into the room. Sirius looked up and saw Anna's doctor standing at the entrance of the room. 'Are you available right now? I would like a word in private.' The man explained.

'You can say it right here. They will hear it eventually.' Sirius told Doctor Martin.

'As you wish. Are you aware that you girlfriend made you medically responsible for her well-being because of the situation with her immediate family?' The man asked Sirius in a very formal tone. This would not be good news. Sirius just nodded, ignoring the fact that the man had just called Anna his 'girlfriend'.

'Of course I know that. It works both ways for us.' Sirius told the man.

'I must tell you that perhaps in a few days we might have to ask you to allow us tot urn of the machinery. Changes are getting smaller that she might wake up.'

Sirius seemed to get real angry within seconds as he heard the doctor's words. Remus could hardly believe what the man was saying, and poor Thomas just looked broken.

'Listen carefully.' Sirius started in a far too calm tone for Remus' linking. The teenager could see that Sirius was barely keeping things together as it was. 'As long as there is just 1% chance that she might wake up I don't want you to ask me that again. Do you understand?' The doctor nodded, and Remus couldn't help but feel like the man had expected this kind of reaction. As the man left the room Remus came up to Anna and took her hand.

'Anna pleas wake up. We need you to wake up.' After those words he quickly went back to his place in the corner o the room.

'I hate that man! He really sucks.' Sirius said as he was back on his own place next to Anna. Thomas was about to agree when they heard a small and weak voice speak. It was just a small whisper, yet it was audible.

'I was always told that that's what you did…'

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**_So this was it... Hope you all liked it !! _**

**_Read and Review :)_**

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